Doah's Ramblings

Brennan Manning's "All Is Grace: A Ragamuffin Memoir"

2011-12-29T08:04:00.001-08:00

If you were to read Brennan Manning's "All Is Grace" without having read some of his other books, I wonder if you would be has moved as I was. I believe the answer is, "Yes." However, if you're reading this and have not yet read one of his books, it would be my desire to have you start first with "Abba's Child: The Cry of the Heart for Intimate Belonging." Then in true Wizard of Oz fashion, you could move on to this memoir and see the man behind the curtain.

Subtitled "A Ragamuffin Memoir," Manning's "All Is Grace" was just recently released on October 4, 2011. It is impossible to express with words just what Manning means to me. For those that know me, I can try by using an analogy to music. His teachings have affected me like Bruce Springsteen's music has, only more. I can try by using a film smile: Brennan Manning is like Cameron Crowe to me.

I was never under any delusion that Manning was the Great Oz, so, upon reading this very candid memoir, I was in no way disappointed to find "just a man" standing in a booth. In fact, why would one be shocked? After all, Manning is most famous for being a self-proclaimed "ragamuffin" and, his most famous book, "The Ragamuffin Gospel" is a de facto confession that this spreader of good news is indeed "bedraggled, beat-up, and burnt out." I shouldn't have been surprised. After all, one of his funny tag lines when speaking is: "Aristotle said, 'I am a rational animal;' I say, "I am an angel with an incredible capacity for beer." Yet, this book is so candid, that truthful, I found myself crying, not teary-eyed, but crying. Why? It wasn't because my "hero" Manning had sunk so low. No, rather it was because in reading this book, I received a clear reminder that's God's love and grace are scandalous enough as to even cover a "non-hero" with this many chinks in his armor!

I don't want to reveal any of the real "meat" of his memoir in this post. Thus, in order to give you an idea of how "real" Manning gets, I will share one of my favorite sections. In said section, the author addresses the burning question often presented to him: "Brennan, how could you relapse into alcoholism after your Abba encounters?" I will not tell you his answer, but I will share a quote that Manning himself felt was important enough to print in full. I had never read the author he quoted before, as such, I found this quotation deeply effective. These words are pulled from Fil Anderson's book, "Breaking the Rules":

My highest hope is for all of us to stop trying to fool others by appearing to have our act together. As people living in intimate union with God, we need to become better known for what and who we actually are. Perhaps a good place to begin would be telling the world--before the world does its own investigation-that we're not as bad as they think. We're worse. At least I know that I'm worse.

Let's get real. For every mean-spirited, judgmental thing some preacher has said, I've thought something nastier, more hateful and more cutting about one of my neighbors. For every alleged act of homophobia by my fellow Christians, I've done something stupid to demonstrate my manliness. For every brother or sister whose moral failure has been exposed, I've failed privately. No matter how boring followers of Jesus may appear to be to the outsiders, they don't know the half of it; trust me.... If we really believe the gospel we proclaim, we'll be honest about or own beauty and brokenness, and the beautiful broken One will make himself know to our neighbors through the chinks in our armor--and in theirs. (pages 178-179 of "All Is Grace")

That is the end of the Anderson quote. The reason I was so deeply moved by it is that it raises the bar for me. It reminds me that I don't need to be anybody other than who I am. It should be noted that that Manning lives up to this quote, admitting, among other things that he has Wernicke-Korsakoff syndrome, or what us alcoholics commonly refer to as "wet brain." So, in true Manning fashion, I don't want to use this post here to make myself look better; thus, I must also admit that this entire section of the book reminded me of my own horrible shortcomings. And, that is a good thing because it, once again, throws me at the feet and mercy of my Abba! Take just one sentence: "For every brother or sister whose moral failure has been exposed, I've failed privately." Wow! How true is that!?! Just one thing this book did for me is it reminded me that I have no right to be "holier than thou" or judgmental because it's a very level playing field, and, as the title says, "All Is Grace." Fine, I will admit it here and now: I am so full of myself that if I had to write a memoir I'd probably title it "All Is Doah." Well, actually, I'm so bad that I would probably only think that, but I wouldn't have the guts to actually do it because I would be too busy worrying about what you might think if you actually knew how self-centered I truly am.

Yes, I am a recovering narcissist. Indeed, I bet there are not even truly altruistic reasons for me even confessing that truth! That said, this topic brings me to another favorite section of Manning's memoir. This part of the book appears much earlier than the aforementioned Fil Anderson quote. In this section, Manning tells of his stint in the Little Brothers of Jesus which is a fraternity founded by a priest named Charles de Foucauld. In 1967 while he was in his "candidacy" to become Little Brother, Manning spent six months in a small village in France. After becoming a Little Brother he moved onto a small village in the desert of Spain. During this time of his life Manning did such non-glamerous things as shoveling manure, washing dishes, befriending the poor, carrying water, and building chicken coops. What's amazing is the realization Manning comes to. He writes:

Even though I had done well in my desert classroom, my motives were peeled away to reveal complete self-centered yuck. Can you be a self-centered chicken-coop builder? Can a water carrier be stuck on himself? The answer I heard was a resounding and humbling "Yes!" That old desire to be liked reared its ugly head. I thought maybe I had grown beyond it or out of it, but I hadn't. I was devastated; everything felt Brennan-centered instead of Christ-focused. (page102)

While I, Doah, would love to put that last sentence on you, I won't. Oh, how I would like to write something like, "Who among us hasn't felt like that?" But, that would be my own insecurities not really owning how Doah-centered I am. You see, the reason I love this book is that it makes me look into the mirror-waters of the pool and see not my face, but the face of Jesus. In reading this book, I see the reflection of Jesus look back at me and he lovingly says, "Doah, it's not about you." You see, in the same way that one could be a self-centered chicken-coop builder, I often walk around my house kidding myself that I am a loving servant, but, in reality I am a self-centered toilet cleaner, a cook who is full of himself, a husband and a father who far too often doesn't love the way Jesus has loved me. This memoir by Brennan Manning makes me want to not "try harder" which would be a shame. Rather, it reminds me of the lavish grace I have received; thus, making me want to give more grace and love better!

Back to Manning's time in the Little Brothers. This part of his story leads me to a portion of the book that really made me think. He writes:

One of my realizations in such an earthy atmosphere was that many of the burning theological issues in the church were neither burning nor theological. It was not more rhetoric that Jesus demanded but personal renewal, fidelity to the gospel, and creative conduct. (p. 101)

You might want to read that above quote one more time. I love it! The burning theological issues in the church were neither burning nor theological. What this means to me is that we, as Christians, need not get bogged down in debates about side issues such as pretribulation, midtribulation, or posttribulation. (Ironically, some, no doubt will be bothered that I didn't write those three terms with hyphens and capital letters.) Instead, we should focus on what Manning here calls "creative conduct" and what I call simply loving well.

I could go on and on about this latest book by my all-time favorite author. I could fill this blog with so many quotations that you wouldn't even need to read the book. I could get into the real sad stuff that made me cry. For example, I could reveal the one act that led the author to fell the most profound shame of his life and ask the questions: "My God, what kind of a man am I? How could that have happened?" But, I won't reveal it. What I will tell you is that Manning answers the question, "What is the telltale sign of a trusting heart?" The answer is: "A trusting heart is forgiven and, in turn, forgives." And, even though this book was written by "the liar, tramp, and thief" who was "otherwise known as the priest, speaker, and author," it was equally written by a man with a trusting heart, a trusting heart that has truly, deeply, and profoundly affected the ragamuffin who wrote this blog post.

In closing, I must touch upon the final part of the book, a short section by John Blase called "A Word After." I must close with this because there is nothing I could write that could possibly summarize what Brennan Manning means to me better than this small quotation by Blase. He writes that Manning's:

consistent banging on the drums of God's unconditional love sounded at a time when many of us had about "had it up to here" with religion and church and, probably most importantly, ourselves. We were the tired, poor, self-hating huddled masses yearning to be free, and along came a patchwork preacher who grinned and said, "You already are. Abba loves you. Let's go get some chocolate ice cream." (p. 200-201)

Yes, I can admit that Blase describes me there. I used to be self-hating and I certainly have, numerous times, had it up to here with myself! Mr. Brennan Manning's teachings helped me reframe my identity. As I closed the back cover against the final page of "All Is Grace," I closed it really, truly, absolutely believing that Abba loves me. I will return the book to my friend, Lorie Taylor, a fellow ragamuffin, with the absolute faith, a vision really of some "time" in the "future" my wife and I, along with Lorie and her husband, will be sitting around a table on the other side of eternity sharing a chocolate ice cream cone with one Richard Manning. We'll be laughing about how wonderfully messed up and beautiful we all really are!

What Happened In Long Beach?

2011-12-01T13:49:00.000-08:00

On Sunday, October 9, 2011, I ran the Long Beach Marathon. Even though I got a personal record (P.R.) at this race, and I am proud to have finished a 26.2 mile run with a time of 3:30:28, heck, regardless of time, I am proud any time I cross the finish line at a marathon, period! Nevertheless, as many of you know, even though I really didn’t want to say it out-loud, I really was hoping to get a Boston Marathon qualifying (BQ) time at this race! My BQ would have had to have been a 3:15 finish which would have put me at a consistent 7:26 pace for 26 miles. Even though I felt like I was totally ready to accomplish this, I failed to do so in Long Beach. So, just what happened during my third marathon?

First, before I get all negative on you, let me tell you what was terrific about this race. This is the first marathon in which I decided to run with an official pacing team. My pacer, the guy holding the balloons and the stick with a sign that said “3:15” was named Michael, and Mike was great! We started way up front in the first wave, corral one, not too far back from the elite runners. That was cool to be up that close to the start line. For my first two marathons, I was nowhere up that close at all. To give you an idea of how close to the start I was, my “chip time” for finishing was 3:30:28, and my “gun time” was 3:30:46, a difference of only 18 seconds. When I ran my first marathon, the L.A. Marathon, in 2009, I was way way back and it took me much longer to cross the start threshold. So, that was kind of cool. It added to the excitement for me.

I actually met the people around me that were part of the 3:15 pace group. Mike got my name, and everybody was very encouraging. We stayed together. Being that I didn’t have a friend running next to me, I was very glad that I had the camaraderie of this group. A side note: my closest friend running the full marathon that day was Martin and he was back near the 4:00 pace group. In addition, the full and half-marathon runners had the same start time in this race. In fact, we had two half-marathoners in our pacing group. Those guys would be with us until the split, around mile 10.5! My wife, Chrisy, her friend, Tricia, and my two sons, Max and Wes were running the half. Chrisy, Tricia, and Max were way back in the furthest corral, and Wes was lined up with the 3:45 pacer.

The race started off well. We were on pace! The pace we would need to maintain was an even 7:26 per mile, and that’s what we were doing. A cool moment for me came right at the beginning, right near the end of mile one, there is a loop that allowed me to see my son, Wes, running with his pacing group. I gave him a huge shout-out from the other side of the course, and he nodded. I knew he heard that and that felt good! Our pace felt okay too. I vividly remember thinking at mile number 3, “I can do this for the whole race. I feel good.” Around mile 4 one of the guys in my pace group said, “Looking good Doah. You make it look easy.” I made everyone laugh when I quickly responded, “Well, I *am* a runner, and so you are you!” Things were looking good despite the little uncertainties the pre-race mishaps had created.

What pre-race mishaps you ask? Well, let’s back-up. We had planned to leave our house at 4:45 a.m., but actually ended up leaving closer to 5:00 a.m., plenty of time to get to a race that started at 7:00 a.m., right? We thought so. And, technically we were right. However, when we got really close to our exit off the 710 freeway, the traffic was narrowed down into one lane and there was a huge back-up, sort of like the back-up that was beginning to form in my colon! Yea, that’s right, having to go “number two” plays a factor in this. And, for those of you who know, me, that will not be a surprise! So, when the clock in the car started saying 6:00, and we were still parked on the freeway, a few of us started to panic. I tried to express verbal calm in the car, but that is where I started to get nervous. We finally got off the freeway, found our parking lot, and were walking to the start line and it was around 6:30ish. On our walk to the start line, Martin spotted three lone outhouses and suggested we stop there at those port-a-potties to avoid the lines at the main ones by the start. Good call on Martin’s part. A few from our group just waited for us and said they would use the ones at the start. I chose to take care of business then. Now, I would have gone poop, but guess what? All three of them did not have any toilet paper, so I just went pee, knowing, of course, I would have a chance to do my dirty business at the main ones. We were off on-foot again. Looking at my watch, I was really beginning to stress now. I tried to calm myself down by offering a prayer out loud to my group, but I was just going through the motions, not tapping into God’s peace. I was walking faster than anyone in our group and a real anxiety was coming over me. At this point, I remember Wes saying, “We’re good on time.” I got snappy with my reply, saying, “We have to find bag check-in, use the restroom, find our pace group, and that’s going to take a long time!” I was beginning to meltdown. Chrisy told me to relax, but it was no use. Once we spotted the vastness of the crowd in line for the main collection of port-a-potties, I got really stressed, said good-bye to Chrisy, Tricia, and Max and ran off with Martin and Wes to find the bag check-in. We had to ask a bunch of people and finally found the UPS trucks that were handling back check-in. After we turned our bags, I told Martin and Wes that I was off to use the toilet and wished them good luck. Upon leaving the check-in area, a fellow runner was vigorously stretching his legs, hands on the fence, kicking his legs backwards, and he kicked me right in my upper leg! It hurt like crazy! I took this as a “bad omen” which goes to show you how mental all this is. I ran to the port-a-potties and found that there was not a single short line! I looked down at my watch and it was 6:50, no time. I decided to try to ignore the fact that I actually could have really used a nice dump. No time! I had to find my pace group! Thus, I went to the first pacer I saw, but he was the 3:45 guy. He told me my guy was way up at the first corral and I was in corral number two. I exited that one, ran to the other one, and frantically pushed through until I found my guy! The National Anthem was sung and we were off running.

Like I said, miles 1 to 4 were uneventful. By my calculations we were running the perfect pace. We weren’t maintaining anything near a perfect 7:26 pace, but we were darn close. Interestingly, mile 2 seemed like a really long mile. My watch beeped for mile 2 long before we hit the course marker. I said nothing. Sure enough, my pacer shouted, “Folks that was a heck of a long mile there!” A bit irritating, but no issue. Despite the fact that I swore I was not going to expend extra energy talking during this race, I couldn’t help myself around mile 5. We passed by the “Aquarium of the Pacific” which was a landmark we could see at mile 1. Being my usual smart-alecky self that I am I said, “We’re still at the damn aquarium?” My pacer said, “You’ll love seeing that thing at mile 26!” I replied, “As long as I don’t see it at 17!” I shouldn’t have been talking, but we were holding firm at our steady pace.

The best part of this marathon for me came between miles 7 to 10. It was during these four miles that I actually found myself thinking, “Man, I love running with a pacing group!” This stretch of the course runs on a concrete boardwalk along the beach. There is sand on both sides of you and the beautiful Pacific Ocean to your right. You could see the Queen Mary and cruise ships, and there was a Coast Guard boat close to shore shooting water up out of several fire hoses just for our enjoyment. The best thing about these four miles was the rhythm of the pacing group. At this point I counted 25 of us, running in a cluster. Our feet were all in rhythm, and there was something strangely soothing about the sound of the feet hitting the pavement in unison! I honestly felt so at peace here, but I begin to question if I was made to maintain this sort of pace over a distance of 26 miles?!? By my calculation, at this point, our slowest pace had been run at a 7 minute, 29 second pace, but our fastest mile had been run at a 7 minute, 19 second pace!?! Not long after the self-doubt kicked in, I got a welcomed surprise: I saw my friends Debbie, Michael, and Jenna Lombrano! They were all smiles and shouted, “Doah! Amazing! Go Doah!” I knew they would be my only loved ones on the course today so it was a welcomed boost!

At mile 10.5 we hit “the split” where the half-marathon runners split off to the left of the fork in the road. Two guys from our pacing group were only running the half, so they left the pack. I vividly remember thinking, “Smart guys! I wish I was running the half.” Indeed, at mile 13 I was totally thinking of my family, Chrisy, Max, Wes, and Chrisy’s friend Tricia who was running with my wife. I was thinking that 13 miles is the perfect distance, and the thought, “Why wasn’t I just doing the half?” wouldn’t leave my brain! Other than that, Miles 10 through 15 were pretty uneventful. I stayed with my group, I wasn’t feeling horrible, but my stomach was beginning to feel like I really should have went and taken that “number two” at the port-a-potties! Of course, in my head, I was beginning to have the dialogue about whether or not my legs had what it takes to finish a full marathon at this pace. And, then, of course, there was the issue of still needing to go poop . . .

Just when I couldn’t override my bowels with my brain any longer, my pace leader, Mike, spoke up out of the blue and did something a great coach would do! He said, and I quote, “Miles 15-20 are mentally important so we are going to begin a 5-mile countdown from 15 to 20!” By this time, much of our 25 or so person group and fallen off, we were down to about only six of us. Mike continued, “This is our core group, 3:15 separates the men from the boys. We stick together from 15-20.” (In hindsight, I don’t know if I thought this was a round-a-bout way of giving me permission to drop-out after mile 20 or not?) With these words of encouragement, I felt inspired. I wasn’t going to give up. Things went well and according to plan until just after mile 17.

“Bonk!” is the sound a body makes when it runs smack into a wall. And, like in the Batman television show of olden days, I’m pretty sure there was a cartoon caption over my head that read, “Bonk!” right about mile 17!

As a runner, I’ve heard a lot about “the wall” and I’ve read a lot about “the wall” and I’ve even thought a lot about infamous wall, but I had never ever hit it. During my previous two official marathons the wall never came. Indeed, during all my long training runs, I had never hit that wall. I was always smart enough to know that, if I kept running, hitting the wall would be inevitable. I had literally thought to myself, “If you keep running, one day you will hit the wall. It is inevitable.” I knew this in the same way a favorite author of mine, Dennis Prager explained a component of happiness. This was a theory he had called the “Flat tire quota” in which he argued that one could be happier if they walked around expecting that they had a “flat tire” coming to them! If you spend your life assuming that you are entitled to NEVER have a flat tire EVER, then, when you get one, you will be very angry and unhappy! However, if you spend your life assuming, “You know, every person, at some point in their life really has a flat tire coming to them,” then, when you get your flat tire one day, and you’re on the side of the road changing it, you can be happy saying, “Well, here’s my flat tire. At least I got that over with.” Along these lines, I actually have thought about the notorious wall in this way. I have told myself, “Dude, if you keep running, you will hit the wall.” So, during this most recent marathon, I hit it!

I don’t think it was just the small hill at mile 17 that did me in. Rather, I think it was just bad timing. I had done much hill training, and I have conquered many hills. As usual, I *ran* this hill on the Cal State Long Beach campus. I ran it, but it kicked my butt. Sure, my legs were hurting, I had to go to the bathroom, and I was a mental wreck, but something else happened that I hadn’t expected: back pain! That’s right, I was having lower back pain. My back hurt! All this resulted in me falling way back behind my pacing group at mid-way mile 17! They were pulling away from me and my self-talk was saying, “You can’t keep up with these guys, so just let them go.” I was really second guessing myself too, and I was thinking, “I shouldn’t have brought this stupid water belt! Maybe that’s why my back is hurting? No one else in this group has a water belt!” By mile 18, it was over. I was done! I told shouted to Mike that I was gonna let him go. I literally said out-loud, “I’m done. I can’t do it. I’m gonna let you guys go.” He turned around and said, “Don’t make me start cussing at you!” But, he had to turn and look back to say it because it was too late, I slowed my pace way down, I let them go! The group pulled way ahead of me, soon they were way out in front of me, far away.

Luckily for me, miles 17 to 19 were run on the Cal State LB campus, because after the mile 18 marker, I encountered the biggest crowd of the marathon. Hundreds of college students from the fraternities and sororities were lining the course, screaming, and holding signs, their energy was contagious! I literally got an energetic tingle throughout my body, a huge emotional rush, and I dug deep. On a side note, it's amazing what a well-placed sign will do! I saw one that said, "You're so sexy," and I thought to myself, "Yea, I am, aren't I. I'd better run faster!" Ha! But, really signs help! At this point, I thought about Mike saying we were going to stick together through miles 15-20, and I pulled inside of myself and gave it everything I had! I sprinted and well before we hit the mile 19 marker I was literally side-by-side with my pacer again. The small 3:15 pace group was blown away! Mike said, “Way to man-up Doah!” Another guy said, “Wow! Nice recovery bro.!” Mike added, “Yep, that’s how you do it guys!” On the surface things were good now. However, my back was killing me, and worse, my breathing was much labored! And, now, I REALLY had to go to the bathroom! I was only able to hang with my pacing group for another mile or so. And, this time I knew I was letting them go for good.

At mile 20 all I could think about was NOT running. I was smacking that wall now something hard and I honestly did not have what it took to push through it. I kept telling myself, “This is now just a 10K, six little miles, but my brain wasn’t buying that!” Somewhere around mile 20 there was a shady park off to my right and there were two lone outhouses right there on the grass! It was at this point I made the conscious choice to let my group pull in front of me, I slowed way down and let them go without saying anything! I started walking. I walked right over to the port-a-potties. Finally! I took my ol’ sweet time taking that long overdue dump! I swear, if the Sunday LA Times was in there, I would have read through the Calendar section. I was in no hurry! Honestly, I had no desire to finish this marathon at this point. It was a good thing I did not have a cell phone because I really wanted to call my wife and tell her to come get me later in the park. When I came out of the restroom, I spotted a family having a picnic nearby; I honestly had thoughts of stealing their watermelon, and then napping on their blanket, a la Goldilocks! I even had visions of gloriously riding back the last 6 miles on the back of a so-called “meat-truck”, those vehicles that take injured runners off the course. My most realistic thought at this point was to sit on the curb and wait for my buddy Martin to pass by. Was he still with the 4:00 hour group? I could take a nice rest and run in with him. I was “this close” to literally sitting on the curb, I had a real vision of watching Martin run by and me saying, “Hey, man, going my way? Can I run with you?” Instead, I ran now. I kept going. Alone.

Actually, considering what my training had been like, what I started to do didn’t really resemble running as much as jogging. It felt like a shuffle really. I came out of that park with about a 10 minute per mile pace! When I thought I was too slow, I’d try to crank it up, but any time I got over a 9 minute mile, I was breathing so hard, it was something I hadn’t felt since I was a kid and had asthma. I was shuffling along and it was taking everything I had. Not long after, I spotted Martin on a loop around. He appeared to be a bit back from the 4:00 hour group. He gave me a heads-up. He had no clue how desperate I was at that point. The course after that was full of long stretches of straight lonely road. I had nobody to keep me company or motivate me.

Around mile 22 I was hurting so bad that I decided to take a walk break. I was walking along the course and a random runner stopped right by my side! I must have been speaking this guy’s language because he looked at me and said, “Yea, I’m pretty much done too.” My immediate response inside my head was, “How dare him!” I thought, “Man, I am NOT done. I don’t see a stinking finish line here. I am not done.” I did not say a word to this guy, but I started running again. That guy was just what I needed. He was my shot in the arm! At that moment, I told myself, “If I run across that finish line today, I am a stud.” I was running. Not fast, but I was running!

At mile 23 I had another runner come along side me and offer me some more positive inspiration. He said, “Just a 5K now!” He passed me. I was being humbled by the beast that is a marathon now, but I shouted back anyway, “I could run 3 miles with my eyes closed!” He said, “That’s the spirit.” Interestingly, somewhere around here I actually came upon a woman who was originally part of my pace group. She had dropped out long before I did, and she obviously passed me when I was in the restroom at mile 20. She was surprised to see me. Without me even speaking she said, “It just wasn’t in the cards for me.” I pulled ahead of her and she said, “Good for you.”

I spent miles 23-24 at somewhere between a 9:00 and 10:00 minute mile. The entire time I was beating myself up in my head for letting my BQ dream go. I began wondering if I could make a 3:30 marathon. The goal had now switched to making a P.R. Just then, around mile 24, the Cliff Pace Team guy with the 3:25 group comes up on me. He says “Swing those arms man! Want to join us?” I tried to go with him but could only do it for about a half mile. He was too fast. I just didn’t have it in me! I was metaphorically kicking myself! I was telling myself, “What the hell is wrong with you? You are a natural 8:00 minute miler dude! Why can’t you find an 8 minute pace right now?” Just then the 3:30 pacer went past me! I was mad. I was defeated. It was mile 25.

At mile 25 a spectator called out to me, “Dude, looking good! You’ve only got one mile left!” That was what I needed. I changed my self-talk. I thought, “Yea, I am looking good to someone that isn’t even doing this! I can do this!” Something happened within me and I found more inside me than I thought I had. I brought my pace back-up to an 8 minute pace. I told myself, “Dude, you are an 8-minute-pace-man! Do this!” I thought of my family. I thought of finishing strong. I thought of just being done!

I brought it all home doing an 8 minute mile for the final stretch. However, I had to dig deep to do so! My breathing was still much labored and I was getting very dizzy and light-headed. I heard the announcer say, “From Lake Forest California, Shenandoah Lynd.” I heard a random voice shout Doah! I spotted my wife and kids and began to cry. I was a wreck when I crossed that finish line. When I hit the mat at the finish-line the clock read 3:30:46. I had just missed the 3:30 mark!

Upon finishing this marathon, I had never been so spent in my life. I walked over to my family and the world was spinning. I was light-headed and felt like I was going to pass out. I dropped gently to the floor in a criss-cross position. When my family asked how I was, I didn’t even respond. I just sat there all silent like. This was the most difficult recovery of my three marathons.

It was a mental blow to not actually finish under 3:15 and to qualify for Boston. The thing is, a couple days later I begin beating myself up for going against my own plan for this race. You see, I originally signed-up for Long Beach as a training run for the California International Marathon (CIM) on December 4, 2011. It is run from Folsom to Sacramento and it is supposedly a great Boston qualifier race. I was going to run Long Beach and just take it easy and then go up to the CIM and run the BQ! However, I got cocky. My training going into Long Beach was so good, my speed work so successful, I knew I could do it. I threw my own plan out the window and bit off more than I could chew at Long Beach. Moreover, I had decided to do two back-to-back marathons (LB on 10/9/11 and CIM on 12/4/11) in an effort to see if I could beat the infamous Post-Marathon Syndrome (PMS). You see, after both my first marathons I had suffered greatly from PMS, which, for me, meant that I was abruptly propelled into the “nothing” extreme of my famous “all-or-nothing” personality, something that has been a chink in my armor my whole life. Well, that didn’t work either. Knowing I had another marathon in two months, I was supposed to be super motivated. However, I wasn't. PMS hit hard.

In the almost two months that have passed since Long Beach, I have not put in nearly the mileage I have needed to. I have also reassessed the purposes for running a marathon. I have decided that, at least for the time being, I don’t really care about a BQ time or running the Boston Marathon. I have reflected back on my three marathons and noted that the best one I ran was the Twin Cities Marathon, which happened to be my slowest. Why was it the best? That’s because I ran side-by-side and finished hand-in-hand with my dear friend and brother-in-Christ, Tony Cloyd. I almost want to start a movement to redefine what “PR” even means. At the very least I want to come up with another phrase like MPR, which means mental personal record, meaning you actually enjoyed your race. You see my Twin Cities Marathon on 10-3-10 with a pace of 4:17:45 was an MPR. I begin deeply regretting not running the Long Beach Marathon *with* Martin Lombrano. I would have rather had the experience of running 26.2 with another amazing friend, than trying to simply be a “fast” runner.

So now I will run CIM, but I am going for another MPR. For years and years I have told my cousin, Elaine, “We should run a race together someday.” Elaine was the person that got me into running, or at least one of them. She was doing marathons long before me, and her fitness level always impressed me. Instead of driving up to her house for a BQ, I’m driving up to her house to have an experience with her. Yes, I admit it: I am not in shape for a BQ right now; I haven’t trained for a BQ right now, so maybe I am just telling myself that it doesn’t matter. Who knows? Maybe I will swing back to that “all” part of my personality in the future again and go for it. Just not this time. Then again, maybe I will surprise myself and just be a consistent guy who likes to run.

So, what happened in Long Beach? The answer to that is: I got schooled. I learned a lesson. I bit off more than I could chew. I didn’t stick to my plan. I didn't qualify for Boston. I hit the wall for the first time ever. I bonked! What really happened in Long Beach on 10/9/11 was I finished my third full marathon! Too bad it wasn’t an MPR though!

Chutzpah

2011-01-06T09:11:00.000-08:00

I was just reminded of this great illustration by Brennan Manning:

CHUTZPAH– Obnoxious Aggressiveness

Are you familiar with the Yiddish word "chutzpah"? It means "supreme self-confidence, boldness, nerve, audacity."

Esther Schwartz was in front of a hotel in Miami with her three-year-old grandson, Jacob. She absolutely adores Jacob. She bought precious little Jacob a canary-yellow, circular sun-hat so the sun wouldn’t touch the top of Jacob’s head.

She also bought him a pail and shovel. Out on the beach, Esther marveled at Jacob’s grace – picking up the sand, putting it into the pail, picking up more sand, putting more sand into the pail. She lifted her face and hands to heaven and expressed her thanks for little Jacob.

Just then a tremendous wave came in, picked up little Jacob, pail and shovel, and washed them out to sea. Esther Schwartz was very upset. She looked up at the sky and shouted, "Who do You think You are? Do You know who I am? I am Esther Schwartz. My husband, Solomon Schwartz, is a physician, and my son, Billy Schwartz, is a dentist. How dare You do that?"

Just then a second tremendous wave washed little Jacob, pail and shovel, right back to his grandmother’s feet. Esther Schwartz looked up at the sky and shouted, "He had a canary-yellow hat. Where’s the hat?"

That, my friends, is chutzpah. All for me and precious little for you, whether it be with regard to God or other people.

Source: The Furious Longing of God by Brennan Manning

0.1% Club

2010-10-04T06:39:00.000-07:00

Finished my second marathon yesterday in Minnesota!

Here is a really cool message I got from my Nike+ site . . .

Running for a Cause!

2010-08-23T11:11:00.001-07:00

I have decided to run the Medtronic Twin Cities Marathon on October 3, 2010, for charity. I am running to support the Elizabeth Glaser Pediatric AIDS Foundation. I am raising money through a very cool fundraising site called crowdrise. If you're interested, you can donate and support this cause by visiting here: Doah/Tony Run for Pediatric AIDS. I would appreciate prayers for a good run on Sunday, October 3rd as well.

Running Stats 2009

2010-01-07T14:27:00.001-08:00

Me after the full marathon, May 25, 2009

3:57:17 finish time

I am almost certain that my buddy Tony Cloyd would be the only person really interested in this post, but here it goes.

The bummer is that my Nike+ died on me last year. Get this . . . it died right before my full marathon. Can you even imagine how frustrating it is that my Nike+ says my farthest run was 21.1 on May 1st and NOT 26.2 when I ran the L.A. Marathon on May 25th? I checked my handwritten charts and there were 108 miles NOT calculated by my Nike+ in 2009. Therefore, my total mileage ran in 2009 was . . . .

drumroll please . . . .

811 miles!

I am proud of that, but I actually did kind of start slacking off toward the end of the year. Honestly, I had originally set a goal to run a total of 1000 new miles in 2009. So for the record, I fell 189 miles short of that goal. Nevertheless, I think 811 miles in one calendar year is pretty good.

That's an average of 67 or so miles per month in 2009.

Let's see if I can top 811 miles in 2010. I'm not setting any mileage goals this year. Rather, my goal is just to keep running consistently and to complete my second marathon.

Happy New Year!

Christmas Letter 2009

2009-12-20T14:12:00.000-08:00

December 25, 2009

Dear Friends and Family,

I was recently reading an article in Time magazine titled, “The ‘00s: Goodbye (at Last) to the Decade from Hell.” It posited that the first ten years of this century would likely go down in history as one of the worst decades America, indeed the world, has ever seen. The author pointed out that the 00s were bookended by 9/11 at the start and a financial wipeout at the end. It got me thinking about the last ten years. Think about it, if I were to mention the 60s you might think of Kennedy, hippies, The Beatles; the 70s, disco, Vietnam, and Watergate; the 80s, legwarmers, Thriller, and The Cold War; 90s, grunge, Clinton/Lewinsky, and Seinfeld. But, what will define the 00s? I don’t know; however, I do know that it seems like only yesterday I was being warned of a Y2K meltdown, and I personally can’t believe this decade is now about to come to an end! As I read the doom and gloom article, I thought of all my friends that are out of work or the victims of cut hours and reduced pay. Yet, as I began to personalize things, I realized this past decade has been very good to my family. More than anything, I feel blessed.

Kasey was born in 2004, so ten years ago, we wouldn’t have had her jumping around our home. As I type this she’s happily playing with her best friend and fellow 5-year-old, Samantha, another blessing bestowed during the 00s. As illustrated by this friendship, Kasey is very relational. We call her our “love bug” which is a title her kindergarten teacher whole-heartedly agreed with as she literally kissed her report card during parent conferences, proclaiming, “I love her, I love her, I love her.” Kasey, in turn, loves school. She is also an obvious grandma’s girl, preferring Chrisy’s mom, Sherry, who lives with us, to others in the family much of the time. Considering the amount of time she spends with her, it is easy to see why. Kasey is a true morning person, happy and spreading joy from the moment she gets up. She is docile, loving, and agreeable. If there was one phrase that sums Kasey up it would have to be her often uttered, “I love you to infinity and beyond.”

Zoey came into this world in 2002, just 5 months after the twin towers fell. Honestly, I remember asking the question, “What are we doing bringing another child into this fallen world?” I would never ask that question today. Clearly the “why?” was to bring excitement and richness to our lives. Zoey is very extraverted and always asking to help cook, to have a play date, to play a game, read a book, or go outside with her sister to talk to neighbors and play with the neighborhood kids and dogs. She also likes to “borrow” our cell phones to text people; among her favorite is our friend Christina with whom she has been fortunate enough to make crafts with several times this year. With Zoey there’s always a “mom” or “dad” or “grandma” being hollered. Like her mother, Zoey has developed into quite the reader. She always gets her homework done with grandma. Her 2^nd grade teacher has a lot of praise for her. Additionally, she has been showing much dedication in swimming this year, something she has chosen to do year-round. Zoey is passionate, extraverted, and a real feeler. She is the definition of abundant life.

Wes was only 2 when this decade started. Now he is this really fantastic 6^th grader. He is doing very well in school. Normally, I have had a policy about not bragging about school accomplishments, but I was so blown away when this boy scored a perfect 600 on the math portion of his CST this year! Wes is very motivated in school and has become more independent. Usually, it has been dad’s job to proofread the writing and help with final drafts. This year Wes boldly and appropriately said, “Dad I don’t want you to correct anything. I just want to see what I can get on my own.” He’s aced every paper. Wes is also a deep thinker. When we sat down for his parent-teacher conference his teacher said, “You have the coolest child.” Wes is also still very into music and among the best blessings this decade has brought would have to be the sound of his guitar filling up our house. This year he gave quite a performance at the school talent show. Wes has been excelling on the local swim team and has also been running for fun. Above all, Wes is helpful and thoughtful. It is not uncommon for him to undertake his siblings’ chores and to do so without grumbling.

Max turned 4 at the beginning of this decade. Now he is taller than dad! Height is not the only way he has grown. For his 13^th birthday we held a “passage to manhood” blessing ceremony for him. Many of the people that have watched him grow-up were on hand to pass down insights, encouragement, and words of wisdom. What emerged that night was a common theme of character and leadership. Along those lines, we recently received an e-mail from one junior high teacher and a phone call from another, both expressing nothing but praise, thankfulness, and gratitude because Max was their student. They literally thanked us for raising such a boy. At times it is hard to imagine that we had anything to do with it, but we certainly welcome that sort of school-home communication! He is a self-motivator! Of course, Max is now in the junior high youth group at church, which is lead by his dad. Rather than being awkward as expected, it has been a blessing and a blast for both. Max is always willing to participate in the discussions. Moreover, as is the case at home, he always brings a huge sense of humor and comic relief to the table as well. Max has continued his drumming at home and plays percussion in his school’s band. Max too had a phenomenal year in swimming and has been running on his own as well.

Doah turned 40 this year! Okay, who am I kidding? I am the one writing this letter so I’ll just tell you that Chrisy threw me an amazing 40^th birthday celebration bash! My friends The Taylors hosted and it was a total surprise! My friend Tony even flew in from Minnesota! The house was packed out with friends and family from all aspects of my life. As I look back on this past decade I can honestly say that 40 is better than 30! In the year between my 39^th and 40^th birthdays I logged in over 1,000 miles of running. Then, on Memorial Day of this past year I ran my first full marathon! It was the Los Angeles Marathon and I finished in less than four hours! This year has seen a change in my job. For the first nine years of this decade I was at Remington Elementary School, but I was displaced from that site and I am now in a unique position at a place called the ARC where many at-risk students from 6^th through 12^th grade serve out their suspensions. As I personally assess this past decade, serving as the leader of the junior high youth group at our church stands out as something that has been the most meaningful. In this capacity, I continue to serve along some of the most wonderful people I have ever known.

Chrisy finishes this decade in a very different place than when she started it. For the last 18 months, she has shown amazingly consistency in participating in a boot camp. Her physical improvement has been remarkable. Moreover, she has formed an important friendship and bond with the group of women she meets with in the very early morning three days a week. Moreover, Chrisy has even taken up running herself, completing a half-marathon this past October! This year marked her return to full-time employment as well. She continues to do social work for Western Medical Center, Santa Ana. Although we are running our lives at a pace that often makes Chrisy feel like she is drowning, she never ceases to amaze me with her ability to do her job extremely well while managing to support me in my junior high ministry and teaching job as well as making sure that everything is running well and organized at home.

The dawning of 2010 certainly does seem to be a good time to reflect on this past decade. As I write this letter I can honestly state that these past ten years have brought welcomed change in all areas of our lives. I hope this Christmastime and New Year find you able to reflect on your blessings as well.

With love,

The Lynds

Doah, Chrisy, Max, Wes, Zoey, & Kasey.

Writing Therapy

2009-11-12T10:46:00.000-08:00

I recall that old typewriter
smell of the ribbon
clacking of the type bars
rough texture of the keys
the feed roller would spin
moving paper upward
with every line laid down
a wish hoping you'd come back
I'd hit that return lever
imaging a response
admiting it was unlikely
my letters were never mailed
like a theraputic treadmill
that device never let me down
not the way you did
yet, it sits in the attic
like an abandoned child
the only thing of yours I had
I remember that obsolete machine
more than I remember you

Husbands Move Toward Her

2009-11-10T10:59:00.000-08:00

Well, it's been awhile. Nothing wrong. Indeed, I have been experiencing a period of spiritual growth. It feels good. I feel mature and I like being a grown-up. I am happy. Maybe it's a good thing that I haven't thought about blogging in awhile? Nevertheless, I felt like it today.

What's on my mind today is this section of "Love & Respect" by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs.

The section I like the best is very encouraging. It talks about a husband's temptation to withdraw or to stonewall. In short, to be unloving. It begins with the writer sharing the solace he found in Proverbs 24:16 which reads, "For a righteous man falls seven times, and rises again." I love that! By that definition, I am a righteous man! Also, I never want to give into being unloving, ever!

The author is talking about times wherein a man might feel disrespected because his wife is upset. He encourages husbands to not give into the temptation to be unloving or to give up.

He writes:

"While God is gracious and kind, He knows that old habits don't die unless they are dealt with. It is in moments like these that He will speak to you, saying, 'Go back. You honestly forgot to decode her message. You responded like a male. You thought you were doing the honorable thing by refusing to engage her. But that isn't going to work now. It won't stop the craziness. I want you to hear her deeper cry and move toward her. Allow her to vent. Embrace her negativity and anger.'"

He goes on to say, "If you can honestly do that--if you can take the hit and keep coming--then you'll be able to say something like this: 'Honey, I'm sorry for coming across so unlovingly.'"

He continues, "When his wife comes at him with disrespect flashing in her eyes and venom shooting from her tongue, every husband has two choices: (1) defend his pride by firing back venom of his own or stonewalling her, or (2) try to hear his wife's cry and respond with unconditional love. I have made the decision that, with God's help, I will always choose option 2: try to hear [my wife's] cry and respond with unconditional love."

I am so thankful for God's unconditional love for me and I am so thankful that he has given me the power to love well. I have, again, recently had the honor to be brought into another couple's marriage; they are experiencing chaos. They look-up to my wife and I because of our growth. Wow! That is why this stuff is on my mind. My advice to husbands today is just what I choose to put in italics above: decode her message, hear the deeper cry of her heart, and move toward her. Plus, don't forget the great encouragement of Proverbs 24:16, "For a righteous man falls seven times, and rises again." So, to borrow from Springsteen's "My City of Ruins," here, "Come on men, rise up!"

Here is a suggested prayer: "God, thank you for loving me unconditionally. I thank you that I have the same power to love unconditionally. Here in this moment, I am willing to love well. Please give me the wisdom to decode my wife's message, to hear hear what she is realling feeling and what she really means. Please Lord, let me hear the deeper cry of her heart. Now, with your help, I will make the choice to love well and to move toward her."

Bono's Op-Ed Article: Africa

2009-07-13T11:13:00.000-07:00

The other day I took one of those stupid Facebook poll/quiz things. This one asked me to vote for the worst president out of a short list of five presidents. The five are not important, but I happened to pick Jimmy Carter as the worst, and, it just so happens that one of the other choices was our president just before Obama: George W. Bush. I immediately had a friend comment on the quiz and ask, "You really put Carter behind Bush #43, really?" My answer was, "Yes. I would. Talk to me in 25 years."

Today I read an op-ed article written by Bono and published in the New York Times on July 9, 2009. The title of the piece is "Africa" and you can read it by clicking on the title there.

I'm not one to give a lot of credibility to musicians' or actors' political opinions. I have been ignoring Bruce Springsteen and Barbra Striesand for years and they're two of my favorites. However, Bono isn't playing politics. Instead, he's trying to love well. As a result, I feel he is honest, no ax to grind.

One line in one paragraph of Bono's article about President Obama's visit to Ghana in particular drew my attention. Here is the paragraph: "The not-so-good news — that countries like Italy and France are not meeting their Africa commitments — makes the president’s visit all the more essential. The United States is one of the countries on track to keep its promises, and Mr. Obama has already said he’ll more than build on the impressive Bush legacy."

The sentence that I would actually love my friends that have a vitriolic opinion of our 43rd president, Bush to reread is this: "The United States is one of the countries on track to keep its promises, and Mr. Obama has already said he’ll more than build on the impressive Bush legacy." Did you catch that, "the impressive Bush legacy" part? What an honest guy to actually stick his neck out there among all the Bush haters to recognize that Bush's leadership with regard to Africa was important and admirable.

As for that Facebook poll I took, I can't recall ever reading somebody using the line "the impressive Carter legacy" to talk about something President Carter did while actually in office. Perhaps something he did as an ex-president, yes, but the poll wasn't asking about that. Who knows, maybe we won't have to wait a quarter of a century for history to present a realistic view of President George W. Bush.

Moral Exterminators vs. The Sweet Smell Of Grace

2009-07-09T15:46:00.000-07:00

The lack of inactivity in terms of actual meaningful posts might lead you to believe that I am in some sort of thoughtless wilderness. Not true. God has been telling me tons of stuff lately. I dare say I am in a period that might end up yielding a "spike" in the spiritual line graph of my life.

I'm currently reading a great book, WHAT'S SO AMAZING ABOUT GRACE?, by Philip Yancey. This book could produce endless posts, but I thought I would just share one passage. The following passage comes from chapter twelve. Titled "No Oddballs Allowed," this chapter deals with an issue that is of increasing importance to me: Jesus' love of the so called "defectives" among us, me included.

Yancey writes as follows:

A phrase used by both Peter and Paul has become one of my favorite images from the New Testament. We are to administer, or "dispense," God's grace, say the two apostles. The image brings to mind one of the old-fashioned "atomizers" women used before the perfection of spray technology. Squeeze a rubber bulb, and droplets of perfume come shooting out of the fine holes at the other end. A few drops suffice for a whole body; a few pumps change the atmosphere in a room. That is how grace should work, I think. It does not convert the entire world or an entire society, but it does enrich the atmosphere.

Now I worry that the prevailing image of Christians has changed from that of a perfume atomizer to a different spray apparatus: the kind used by insect exterminators. There's a roach! Pump, spray, pump, spray. There's a spot of evil. Pump, spray, pump, spray. Some Christians I know have taken on the task of "moral exterminator" for the evil-infested society around them.

I share a deep concern for our society. I am struck, though, by the alternative power of mercy as demonstrated by Jesus, who came for the sick and not the well, for the sinners and not the righteous. Jesus never countenanced evil, but he did stand ready to forgive it. Somehow, he gained the reputation as a lover of sinners, a reputation that his followers are in danger of losing today. As Dorothy Day put it, "I really only love God as much as I love the person I love the least."

There's so much there in that quote. The first thing is that I absolutely love the quote from Dorothy Day. It is so right on! The second thing is that the above passage makes me ask myself: "Am I pumping a sweet grace into the air or am I pumping poison onto those around me?" I don't want to pump the poison.

I also dig the line that says Jesus gained the reputation as a lover of sinners, a reputation that his followers are in danger of losing today. This is so true and so sad! This reminds me of a line delivered by Flanders' wife in The Simpsons wherein she says, "I've been going to Bible classes. They're teaching me to be more judgmental." Sadly, this perception of us Christians is becoming increasingly accurate; however, this is not how Jesus himself operated. In a very user-friendly move, the author of this book sums up the Old Testament laws as follows: "No Oddballs Allowed." He then points out that Jesus brought another message.

Earlier in the chapter Yancey states: Jesus' approach to "unclean" people dismayed his countrymen and, in the end, helped to get him crucified. In essence, Jesus canceled the cherished principle of the Old Testament, No Oddballs Allowed, replacing it with a new rule of grace: "We're all oddballs, but God loves us anyhow."

To drive this point home Yancey uses the Bible scene found in Acts 10 where in Peter finds himself smack dab in the center of the eye of the hurricane in God's beautiful storm of grace. Read all of Acts 10, but consider this line from Acts 10:28 wherein Peter says, "You know it is against the Jewish laws for me to come into a Gentile home like this. But God has shown me that I should never think of anyone as impure." Peter found that Jesus' church even had room for "unclean" Gentiles like me!

Like the Pharisees of Jesus' day, many among the so-called Christian fundamentalist right are scandalized by a message such as the one Jesus preached. My question for them today is: Are you spreading the sweet aroma of grace or pumping poison onto those non-Christians around you?

Five Sentence Tribute: Farrah Fawcett

2009-06-25T15:35:00.000-07:00

When I was seven and eight years old I actually watched CHARLIE'S ANGELS. Farrah Fawcett played Jill Munroe. I had the above poster on my wall and I knew a lot of other males who pinned it up also (I read that the poster from 1976 sold over eight million copies). THE CANNONBALL RUN (1981) was actually cooler because she was in it. I liked Farrah so much that I actually taped THE BURNING BED onto VHS and watched it more than once.

Five Sentence Tribute: Michael Jackson

2009-06-25T15:09:00.000-07:00

Michael Jackson was the king of pop, a fantastic artist, great performer, and one heck of an underrated songwriter. So, so, so many of his songs make me downright happy: Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough, Rock With You, Human Nature, Wanna Be Startin' Somethin', The Way You Make Me Feel, Man In The Mirror, and the list goes on. I got rid of almost all my vinyl records, but could not sell, trade, or toss the THRILLER album. I was 13 when it came out and nobody was bigger in the 80s (only Madonna, Prince, or Springsteen come close, but not quite). I am happy to have seen him live in 1985 and was just hoping that it could happen again.

Pre

2009-05-06T08:59:00.001-07:00

Last Night's Springsteen Show

2009-04-17T22:54:00.000-07:00

I really wanted to post something about the two Bruce shows I saw last night and the night before. I could spend a lot of time writing about both, but I need to get some much needed sleep. Suffice it to say, I had two incredible nights, really, really good shows. I left night #1 wondering if it could be topped. I mean there were magical moments such as "Spirit in the Night" and a "Racing in the Streets" that gave me chills. Seriously, I was sitting there next to my wife and two sons listening to "Racing in the Streets" thinking, "I'll never forget this moment as long as I live." However, I have to say that last night's second show was really the more amazing of the two. I was on the floor with my sons and it was totally joyful, intense, and fun! It was truly one of the better Springsteen concerts I have ever seen and that is saying a lot. I honestly could write so much here, but I am tired. Anyway, there really isn't much I could add to the review from "Backstreets" which I truly hope you read. Writer Erik Flannigan really captured the magic quality that took place. Photographer Joseph Quever posted some fantastic pictures too, one of which I borrowed and posted above! You can find the review here under April 16 / Los Angeles / L.A. Sports Arena.

Long Live Happiness

2009-04-15T12:44:00.000-07:00

Tony and me outside the Xcel Center, March 16, 2008, St. Paul, Minnesota

This is a post about the last time I saw Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band live in concert. Okay, not the last time, but the most recent time. It was just over a year ago: Sunday, March 16, 2008. I’m thinking a lot about that concert today probably because I am heading out to see Springsteen and the band for my 27th time tonight!

The title for this post comes from the last words Springsteen said as he excited the stage after that concert on 3/16/2008: “Long live happiness!” It is fitting because his concerts have been such a source of joy in my life. That show last March was no exception. Indeed, it was one of the most fantastic nights of my life, one of those nights that will flash before your eyes and bring a smile to your face when you’re on your deathbed.

It was a cold spring night in St. Paul, Minnesota, and I was seeing Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band with my spiritual brother, Tony Cloyd. There were many things that made this night special. First, it would be the first time Tony ever saw Springsteen live! There’s nothing like the excitement of taking someone to there first E Street Band show. Will they “get it”? Keyboardist Danny Federici wasn’t playing with the band since November, 2007 due to illness. Would his replacement Charlie Giordano make this not as good? Second, I was able to fly out to Minnesota by myself to spend time with my friend. Tony and I have bookend birthdays: his is March 1 and mine is March 31. This trip was right in the middle. Third, it was my 26th Bruce show, but my first time seeing him outside of California. That was a novelty. Would there be a different vibe in this part of the country? I was excited.

Tony and I had made a day of this. We played around the Twin Cities all day. As Chrisy had been generous to give me this trip as a birthday present, Tony’s wife, Julie, was kind enough to let us play all weekend! We had general admission (GAs) tickets on the floor and decided to go down to the venue, The Xcel Energy Center, way early to try our luck with the wristband lottery to be among the lucky few hundred to get into the pit at the front of the stage. That was a long ordeal that involved lots of standing, lining up in sequential order, and waiting for a number to be called. Alas, we just missed the cut off and ended up not getting into the pit. However, we were let into the venue early and were able to get as close as possible without actually being in the pit: right up against the pit barrier. As witnessed by the below photo that Tony took with his iPhone, it was really close!

This is a picture Tony took with his phone.

The tickets listed a 7:30 show time, but by the time 7:30 rolled around we had actually been standing for something like five hours! I remember thinking, “Man, these sore feet just to get into the pit and we didn’t do it. I will never get GAs again.” Bruce took the stage at 8:33 p.m. and the second he broke into the first song, NIGHT, all that tiredness and soreness was gone! Totally gone! My thoughts immediately changed to “This is so worth it! I have dancing room! GAs are the only way to go!” (In fact, for tomorrow night’s show, night #2 in L.A. I have GAs and am trying the pit lottery again).

Let me back up. I know many of you will in no way relate to this, but one of my very favorite feelings in life is the feeling I get right when the house lights go out and the E Street Band takes the stage. There are few things like it in the world: the anticipation, the excitement, knowing what is to come! I love watching the silhouettes come out, two-by-two usually, maybe Garry and Roy, Max and Nils, Patti and Steve, and then the Big Man, and then the man himself, the Boss, Bruce Springsteen and he screams, “Is anybody alive out there?” There are few times in my life I feel so alive so I scream back with a resounding, “Yes!” Tonight they open with NIGHT from the 1975 classic album, “Born to Run.” The euphoria begins!

Here was the set list for Tony’s first E Street Band show:
1. NIGHT
2. RADIO NOWHERE
3. LONESOME DAY
4. DARKNESS ON THE EDGE OF TOWN
5. GYPSY BIKER
6. MAGIC
7. REASON TO BELIEVE
8. PROVE IT ALL NIGHT
9. SHE’S THE ONE
10. LIVIN’ IN THE FUTURE
11. THE PROMISED LAND
12. WAITIN’ ON A SUNNY DAY
13. BACKSTREETS
14. DEVIL’S ARCADE
15. THE RISING
16. LAST TO DIE
17. LONG WALK HOME
18. BADLANDS
____________________
19. GIRLS IN THEIR SUMMER CLOTHES
20. JUNGLELAND
21. BORN TO RUN
22. DANCING IN THE DARK
23. AMERICAN LAND

There was not a bad moment in the show, pure bliss from 8:33 to 10:52! However, there were moments so fantastic that they are etched in my memory the way they engrave words like “July 24, 1993 – Our Wedding Day” into the glass on a pair of Champaign glasses. Here are a few of them from the concert of 3/16/08:

The first and second songs rocked, really rocked, but true magic didn’t come until the third song, LONESOME DAY, it was like a beautiful symphony the way everybody came together and it gave me a great feeling of pure joy. It was the opening track of my favorite album, “The Rising,” and it never sounded better. As always, Bruce shined on guitar.

A professional shot of our concert in St. Paul that night.

There was a moment during the fifth song, GYPSY BIKER that summarizes why I love the E Street Band, they are more than a band; they are family. Steve and Bruce share a mike for a minute and do a duet on the part that says, “my love for you brother, lying still and unchanged” and I got goose bumps. I remember thinking about the history these to men share, what they’ve been through. “This is the guy Bruce wrote BOBBY JEAN about.” I started thinking about my friend next to me and how he’s my brother too. This is not to mention that Steven’s guitar solo during this song knocked my head off it was so good.

REASON TO BELIEVE, the seventh song of the night was a trip! Bruce did this song in an entirely different way this tour, using the bullet mic, a total bluesy version! Great stuff. Also, this was a song in which Nils shined on guitar.

Right after that came PROVE IT ALL NIGHT and all three main guitar players, Bruce, Steve, and Nils, shared this one. It was like a three-way solo if there is such a thing. This song was pure relationships working off each other in a way that I have literally never seen at any of the 250 or so concerts I have seen in my lifetime. When they got to the chorus and sang, “Prove it all night for your love” it seemed like a little bit of heaven.

On SHE’S THE ONE it was Professor Roy who shined on his keyboards! Amazing work! The song DEVIL’S ARCADE was all musically perfect, the entire big band blended into musical perfection. It is hard to explain, but it was simply because of the instrumentation work that at this moment during the 14th song I hit the pure euphoric stage of the show.

Then, a few songs later it really got emotional for me. For some reason during the new song LONG WALK HOME, I began to tear up. It was the first verse when Bruce sang, “I could smell the same deep green of summer, above me the night sky was glowing, in the distance I could see the town where I was born.” Honestly, I think it might have been something about being in the heartland there in Minnesota, but the belonging of this song laid me flat. Consider these lyrics that echoed out over the Xcel center:

My father said, “Son we’re lucky in this town
It’s a beautiful place to be born
It just wraps its arms around you
Nobody crowds you, nobody goes it alone.
You know that flag flying over the courthouse
Means certain things are set in stone
Who we are, what we’ll do and what we won’t.”

It was weird, I thought of Tony moving to Minnesota and his longing for that state and it actually made sense to me. I thought of “nobody goes it alone” and how Tony hasn’t let me go it alone for so long. Maybe it was the lovely backing vocals by Nils, I don’t know, but it all felt more than comforting, more than perfect. And, I may be crazy, but it did have a different feel than a California show.

The main set ended one song later at 10:15 with a great version of BADLANDS. They came out for an encore that lasted almost 40 minutes!

Another professional shot from that evening: Mighty Max, The Big Man, and The Boss.

Without a doubt the most amazing moment of the encore was the classic story JUNGLELAND from the “Born to Run” album. I know most of you will think this next statement is hyperbole, but it is not to me: I honestly don’t think you have truly lived until you have seen this song live. You have to experience the masterful sax solo by the Big Man Clarence Clemons at least once in your life. The sax solo is as long as it is hauntingly lovely. The song is the story of a dreamer named Magic Rat. In the end after the sax solo has pulled your heart out Bruce closes the song with an amazing final verse that includes perhaps my favorite lyrics in the history of rock ‘n’ roll. This line reiterates my belief that art matters, this line explains why Rat get shot, Bruce delivers it in a concerned tone, a whisper of desperation if you will . . . .

“. . . And the poets down here don’t write nothing at all,
they just stand back and let it all be . . .”

Heartbreaking. I’m done. That line alone was worth the price of admission.

But, it’s not over, full house lights come on for the final three: BORN TO RUN, DANCING IN THE DARK, and AMERICAN LAND. The entire place is jumping, literally. There is much dancing. Even Tony and I lock elbows and swing as if doing some Irish gig. It is all the very definition of fun!

After the long line of band members, arms locked, take their bow, and before exiting the stage Bruce walks over to the mic one last time and tells us all: “Long live happiness!” It’s a line I have tried to hold on to between the 11 months that have passed between that last Springsteen show in St. Paul and the one I will see tonight with my wife and two boys.

It’s over and then it’s the moment of truth. Did Tony like it? Before I could ask, our new friends, all those folks around us that we got to know through hours of standing together want to know also. A lady from California asks first: “So did you like your first show?” Tony beams and replies: “I am a true believer. I have been converted!” That’s not enough for me so I ask: “What did you really think?” I will never forget Tony’s response: “I wish someone could find a way to harness that man’s energy. You could plug him in and have enough energy to power the Twin Cities!”

Tony indeed “gets it.”

Tony and I outside of Mickey's Diner after the show.

Afterwards, we walked through the chilly streets of St. Paul to the famous diner called Mickey's and had a very memorial meal of homemade stew. We sat and talked and let Sunday night turn into Monday morning. It was an evening I will never forget.

Long live happiness indeed!

The Big Four-Oh: 1,077 miles!

2009-03-31T08:44:00.000-07:00

Today is my fortieth birthday! I was born March 31, 1969. That is four decades on this planet! What strikes me most about today is where I am in life. I am pleased with it. Why? The only thing I can think of is Psalm 40 from the Bible. THE MESSAGE words verses 1-3 this way:

"I waited and waited and waited for God.

At last he looked; finally he listened.

He lifted me out of the ditch,

pulled me from deep mud.

He stood me up on a solid rock

to make sure I wouldn't slip.

He taught me how to sing the latest God-song,

a praise song to our God.

More and more people are seeing this:

they enter the mystery,

abandoning themselves to God."

That is me. I feel God himself pulled me out of the ditch and rescued me. I feel so lucky to be living the lifestyle I am living today on my fortieth birthday. I am so happy that I have spent 16 of those 40 years with Chrisy. I am proud of that fact as we have built something that is valuable and lovely. I have four wonderful children who love me. As evidenced by this overwhelmingly joyful weekend that just passed, I also have a plethora of great friends. I am blessed.

Last year on March 31, 2008, I actually made a vow to myself. Nobody knew about it except God and me. I said, "The 365 days between my thirty-ninth and fortieth birthdays will be the healthiest year of my life." I meant that in the spiritual, emotional, mental, and physical sense. I really prayed a lot that God would grow me in all four of those realms. I think he did.

The aspect that is easiest to measure is the physical as I chose to gauge it with running. Since I said it was the days "in between" my birthdays, I will not count any run that I might do tonight. That said, I am looking at my running log for April 1, 2008 to March 30, 2009 and I have logged 1,077 miles of running during that time. That is an average of 89 miles per month. I actually went out for 213 runs during that time. The average distance of those runs was 5 miles per run. My average pace has been 8.01 minutes per mile. I feel really good about this accomplishment.

A wise counselor I once had told me that it took about 60 times of doing something to make it an actual "habit" in life. I honestly never knew if I could consistantly stick with running over a long period of time like that. I am happy that, over the last year, I have developed this habit of running because I honestly feel like it has helped me to usher in this next decade of my life feeling very vibrant. In fifteen days I will be at a Springsteen concert and I'm certain he will pose his famous question: "Is anybody alive out there?" I will answer with a resounding, "Yes, I am!"

Today I take credit for nothing. I thank God that he taught me to sing his song. It is a trip how abandoning yourself to God leads to abundant life. It is indeed a mystery that surrender leads to freedom. I am happy.

out-and-back

2009-03-15T05:40:00.000-07:00

Every time I got out for my run
I pass by an old oak tree
It's been abandoned
left alone to fend for itself
mangled and worn
yet full of fortitude and strength
it reminds me of me
a great creation clinging to
the side of the ravine
displaying its ruthless trust
dependent upon no one
but God as it patiently
awaits the next storm
only then able to soak in
refreshing rain
running down its trunk
like affirmation from a
trusted lover
as I pass by trudging through
its wildflower neighbors
I know I make the tree truly
happy: all it desires is
reconignatiton
oh, how, I adore the out-and-back

The Best Movie of 2008

2009-02-21T16:49:00.000-08:00

Let's get two things out of the way immediately. First, in the spirit of 1 Corinthians 8:9 which says "Do not cause a brother or sister with a weaker conscience to stumble," I want to warn the reader that my favorite film of the year has a lot of nudity in it. Marisa Tomei plays Cassidy, a stripper and she shows everything. If you find that offensive, or if it will cause you to sin, then don't see the film. Second, as you probably know, Bruce Springsteen has a song in this film. Aptly named, "The Wrestler" plays over the credits. I am certain some will think I like this film because Springsteen is associated with it. However, that is not the case. It is just a coincidence that Springsteen happened to write a song for the film I think is the best film of the year. To prove this I want to point out that I didn't name PHILADELPHIA (1993), DEAD MAN WALKING (1995), JERRY MAGUIRE (1996), or LIMBO (1999) my favorite film of the year even though they all featured a very good Springsteen song.

Directed by Darren Aronofsky, THE WRESTLER is my very favorite movie of 2008. I honestly like it more than any of the five films that were nominated for an Oscar in the Best Picture of the Year category by the Academy. Moreover, the film contains my three favorite performances of the year: Mickey Rourke, Marisa Tomei, and Evan Rachel Wood. Mickey Rourke is up for Best Actor for his portrayal of Randy "The Ram" Robinson. Marisa Tomei is up for Best Supporting Actress for playing Cassidy, an exotic dancer. I've often heard people say things like, "Man, Mickey Rourke is amazing, but the movie isn't." I don't get that because I feel an amazing performance is indeed the film. This is a fantastic film. It should have been up for Best Picture. Now, I'm not at all interested in the type of wrestling that is depicted in the film. However, I have to ask: When is the last time we've seen a film about wrestling like this? Probably never. That alone makes this an interesting film. At least it is not derivative.

director Darren Aronofsky crafted a film

that emotionally pinned me

I knew I would like this movie. The very first time I saw the trailer I actually teared up during the scene between Mickey Rourke's lead character and his daughter played by Evan Rachel Wood. Before seeing it I saw the trailer a few more times and I cried each time. Something struck a chord with me. I really shouldn't go into the scene's details too much in case you haven't seen the film, however they are out on the boardwalk and it's a killer. For me, there was no finer moment of acting on display in all of last year's films. The line of dialogue that laid me out is this line that Randy delivers to his daughter, Stephanie. She is played wonderfully by Evan Rachel Wood. Randy says this: "I'm an old broken down piece of meat and I'm alone. And I deserve to be alone. I just don't want you to hate me." Just think of the extent of this man's pain that he believes he deserves to be alone.

Randy "The Ram" Robinson & his daughter Stephanie

in my favorite sequence

Anyone who knows me well knows that most of my favorite movies have very broken characters in them. I find broken people compelling. This is a movie about very broken people. Cassidy, the striper played by Marisa Tomei is certainly broken. In a recent interview ("When their careers take off" L.A. Times 2/19/09) I read that Tomei talked to many exotic dancers before playing this role. The article said she discovered women who were, "disengaging intellectually and emotionally from their work." She said in part it was a mind-set "to not really know your own self really well." I think that is how she played Cassidy, as a tragic woman that doesn't want to know herself to well. I can relate to this because it has been one of the most painful things in my life to actually take the voyage of discovery to really know myself, to find out what is really wrong with me and to find out what I really truly desire in life. That journey always involves opening up to people and risking a lot. Tomei goes on to say, "It's not like they exposed themselves to me." What an ironic statement. People who are in the business of exposing themselves for a living, but actually unwilling to expose themselves emotionally for fear of the damage it would do. The actress sums up her character using the phrase, "non-exposure" and notes, "It's a painful place to be, with the mask." Indeed, wearing the mask ultimately doesn't bring us joy in life, but the mask becomes a protection that we are used to. For me this film is partially about that. Are we going to take our mask off and expose true selves to others? Will we allow ourselve to know and be know, to be loved, can we stand the pain of THAT?

Cassidy played by Marisa Tomei

It is not just Cassidy that is damaged in this film, Rourke's lead character, Randy "The Ram" Robinson, is even more dysfunctional.

A few lines from Springsteen's title song capture the essence of the lead character's brokenness:

"These things that have comforted me I drive away
This place that is my home I cannot stay
My only faith is in the broken bones and bruises I display"

I guess you either get those lyrics or you don't, but I get them because I have known people like that. I honestly feel that my own father is a little like that, pushing away, even subconsciously, the very things that would bring you the most joy. I love those lyrics more than I can explain. Those few lines sum up the entire film. This is a movie that is about people who are stuck in a rut of pushing away the very things that will ultimately bring them the most comfort and joy.

I could write a lot about this film, but actually Bruce Springsteen describes it best in a recent extended quote from a "making of" documentary (making of "Working on a Dream" VH1). In initially describing phone call that he got from Mickey Rourke, Springsteen goes on to describe his song that he wrote for the film which fit the character so well. He said this:

"It's basically a song that's sort of about being damaged and living on. Damage, what it does to somebody, the inability to get in. The inability to stand the things that nurture you. These things will give you a life, if you an stand them."

Springsteen goes on to say that he read the script and thought, "Okay, this is about somebody who doesn't have these capabilities, and instead you find your identity in the damage that's been done to you. You find your identity in your wounds, the places where you've been beat-up and you turn them into a medal and it's a very dangerous thing to do. We all wear these things we survived with some honor, but the honor is in: You wear those things, but also transcend them! This is somebody in search of that honor. He's living in search of that honor."

I agree with this assessment of the film. It is about a very sad character that ultimately doesn't find that honor which makes it a very sad film. However, it is a film that I love because it reminds me of what is important.

The amazing Mikey Rourke as Randy

The main character is tragic because he doesn't manage his life well. In the same interview, when discribing the character, Randy Robinson, Springsteen also says, "There is no part of yourself that you leave behind. You can't remove any part of yourself. You can only manage the different parts of yourself." Then he gives this metaphor for life. Here he is talking about only one person and how throughout life you never are far from your old selves, all you can do is put the healthiest self, the most wise self in the driver's seat. Springsteen says, "There's a car, it's filled with people: the 12 year old kid's in the back, so is the 22 year old, so is the 40 year old guy that likes to screw up, so is the 30 year old guy that wants to get his hands on the wheel and push the peddle to the metal and drive you into a tree, so all these people are in the car, that's okay, that's never gonna change, nobody's leaving. The doors are shut, locked, and sealed until you go into your box, but who's driving makes a really big difference!"

You see, the problem with Randy The Ram in this film is he is never able to put the right guy in the driver's seat because he has let his brokenness define him. That is why as I watched the movie I was screaming inside, "No, no, noooooo, don't screw this up, don't let that person down, don't do this to yourself or you will be sorry." Unfortunately, if you know somebody like this character, you know what will happen, but the beauty of this film is taking the journey, watching real life unfold, reflecting upon the importance of rising above your ruts and the ability to invest in the things that will ultimately bring you the most happiness no matter how difficult they may be to obtain. When I think about THE WRESTLER, it makes me think, "Doah, are you going to manage yourself well enough to have an abundant life?" You see, Springsteen's seemingly strange "car full of people" quote makes perfect sense to me. Randy "The Ram" Robinson never allows the right guy in the drivers seat. This film reminds me that, yes, I have been hurt, I have been damaged, but all that old pain cannot define me. The hurt little boy, the drunk and numb 20 year old, the desperate 30 year old, those old Doahs need to take a back seat today because my healthy self, this self that can stand love and acceptance has now got control of the steering wheel.

For me, as is often the case, the emotional response that occurred within me is what makes THE WRESTLER my favorite film of last year.

Previous "Best Movie" posts:
2007
2006
2005

Memories, song, and my dad

2009-02-14T16:06:00.000-08:00

Memories are funny things. Sometimes they come back out of nowhere and blindside you, so vivid, so real. That is what happened to me this afternoon. For me memories are extrinsically linked to music. That is to say that so many memories are jarred loose by music. So I was out on a 9-mile run and listening to my iPod and had selected Jimmy Buffett. The day was beautiful and I was in a grove and Buffett was singing:

"Yeah, now, the sun goes slidin cross the water

sailboats they go searchin for the breeze

salt air it aint thin

it can stick right to your skin and make you feel fine

makes you feel fine . . . "

Grand memories of my dad, Grant Lynd, just flowed in. As real as the beautiful sun that was beating down upon me, as real and fantastic as the legs that were propelling me forward. Tears welled up from within me, fantastic tears of gratitude and love.

You see, one of the most vivid memories I have from my life are those of my early childhood and the weekends I spent with my father, Grant. These memories are both of his place on Ocean Avenue in Seal Beach as well as his condo on Barefoot Circle in Huntington Beach. All the memories have a soundtrack of good music, mostly Jimmy Buffett, Jackson Browne, and Bruce Springsteen. The lyrics I quoted above from Buffett are off his 1974 album, A-1-A. It is my favorite Buffett album. It is my dad's favorite too. I remember that album and specifically "Tin Cup Chalice" swirling through the wonderful breezy beach air and all the memories are good.

My dad had the best stereo system and always played music loud. I was always in awe of my father. Many of these memories stem from around the time I was 11 years old. That was 1980, the year my dad took me to my first Buffett concert. I remember everything. It was at the Universal Amphitheater. There was no roof on it then. It was Buffett's "Volcano" tour. I remember what he opened with, I remember what song he was playing midway through the show when I had to go to the bathroom and I didn't want to miss anything, I remember him closing the show with "Survive" and I remember being deeply moved by that song. I remember the shirt my dad bought me. My father has always been so generous. On concerts for me alone he must have spent enough money, to borrow a line from Buffett, to buy Miami. I remember the deep feeling of love and gratitude I had for my dad that night. My dad would take me to see Buffett literally every year after that for a decade. My dad was so fun! Those Buffett shows were a blast!

But today while I am running, I'm not thinking about Buffett. I'm thinking about Grant. I am thinking about being 10 years old and in that condo at the beach and how enamored I was with my father. He was always so handsome. I remember him working out as Buffett's music floated though the house, from sliding door to sliding door, and blowing out toward the Pacific. My dad would let me work-out with him. He taught me about weights, sets, and reps. During these memories, he was in the decade between his 30th and 40th years of age and I remember thinking how young he looked for his age. He was built. A good looking man.

Funny, I never thought about it much before today, but he was a runner. He subscribed to Runners World like I do now. I remember running past the harbor and down to the corner of PCH and Warner with him. I remember getting side stitches and not wanting to say anything about needing to stop because I didn't want to disappoint my hero. This memory is part of what brought me to tears of joy today.

I started thinking about all the things I have in common with my dad: I'm running now, we both love music, we've both seen Buffett more than 20 times, we both love the ocean, and so much more. I started thinking about all the good things he brought into my life. Love of music, yes, but so much more: love of history and a deep appreciation of education just to name two. He is a college graduate and he steered me that way. I remember how he taught me about bees. I think about how he took me surfing. I recall when he took me skydiving. I see our trips to Mexico in my mind. I am so grateful for Grant.

I'm still running and all these thoughts are flying through my head. In the short time it takes to listen to "Tin Cup Chalice" I've relived every good thing, and there are many, that my father ever did for me. I'm happy.

So the chorus comes around again,

"And I wanna be there

I wanna go back down and die beside the sea there

With a tin cup for a chalice . . . ."

It all makes so much sense now. I kinda do wanna be there. But, I'm even more appreciative for where I am now! It's my daughter's 7th birthday today and I thank God for her. Part of these tears come not from being a son, but memories of seven years ago today when Chrisy delivered what she rightfully called "the best Valentine's gift ever!" I thank God for making me a dad four times over. I thank God for my father, truly, sincerely, thank God for Grant Lynd. I'm grateful that God gave me sons even though I didn't think I could be a good enough dad for them. I am though. I thank God that I am married and faithful. I thank God that it's Valentine's Day and he gave me Chrisy and we've been together for nearly 16 years.

This May my wife and I are even taking our boys to their first Jimmy Buffett concert. So, yea, I'm doing some things the same as my father did. I look to the sky. I throw my arms up. I'm alive. I feel whole. I am truly happy.

Best Picture Nominees 2008

2009-02-08T07:54:00.000-08:00

As is my tradition, I have finished viewing all five of the nominations for the Academy Award category, Best Motion Picture of the Year. This is in no way a prediction of who the Oscar will go to, but I would like to rank the five films in the order that I liked them.

Here is my ranking of favorite to least favorite:

1. THE READER--Stephen Daldry

2. THE CURIOUS CASE OF BENJAMIN BUTTON--David Fincher

3. MILK--GUS VAN SANT

4. SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE--Danny Boyle

5. FROST/NIXON--Ron Howard

For me, when I say "the order order in which I liked them," that is really synonymous with me saying, "the order in which they affected me." So, no, I don't think the Academy will give Best Picture to THE READER, but, of the five, it is the one that emotionally moved me the most.

Okay, fine, I'll say it . . .

2009-02-03T12:55:00.000-08:00

Best halftime show ever!

Yep, I rewatched it again. Here is my official ranking of all halftime shows in history from greatest to worst:

1. Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band
2. U2
3. whatever . . . .

My Halftime Show Post

2009-02-02T23:14:00.000-08:00

So that image is how it all started last night at during the Super Bowl halftime show. The black and white image of the man himself, Bruce Springsteen, and the Big Man, Clarence Clemons, which played homage to the classic "Born to Run" album cover from 1975. I love the image. I loved last night's show!

Believe it or not, I wasn't sure if I was gonna post about the halftime show, mostly because people were expecting me to and I actually started to have thoughts like, "There are more important things to post. This is just fun, not really important." But, that's just it, it's FUN! That's what I saw up there for 13 minutes, pure fun!

Here's how it broke down:

Tenth Avenue Freeze-Out - 4 minutes

Born to Run - 3 minutes, 40 seconds

Working on a Dream - 1 minute, 40 seconds

Glory Days - 3 minutes, 20 seconds

I was pleased, very pleased. If you were not familiar with Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band before the halftime show you probably are thinking one of two choices: (1) That was a great performance and I can see why Doah would like to experience that for a couple hours; (2) I don't get it.

As far as the latter, I've heard a few people complain about Bruce's schlock, that it was high on the "cheese factor" so to speak. Here's the thing, that "cheese factor" thing you saw is what I like. If indeed that is "hokey," then hokey is what I've always liked!

Bruce is a showman. He's always been aware that he has a job to do, he needs to take us away on a journey of pure fun! He actually works to have everybody come along. He's always worked the crowd with fun stuff like, "Put the chicken fingers down . . . is there anybody ALIVE out there?" I adore that. Anybody could go out and just play the guitar and sing, but the man works the crowd and if you'll go along with him, you'll have the time of your life. So when he yells, "Is there any body alive out there?" I yell back, "Yea! I am! Fully!" When he says, "We're going have a rock 'n' roll baptism tonight!" I'm the first one in the water! That knee-sliding, back bending, piano jumping, joke-making, "preacher man" with exhortations, showman is what I've always enjoyed.

What I think we got was what I had hoped for: that he could somehow get something that actually felt like a real Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band show and compress it into such a short time period. I think he did that. I think those of you who have not ever seen him live saw a really really mini version of an E Street Band show. Make no mistake about it either, those other guys up there with him matter. I do think you witnessed the power of the legendary E Street Band! Albeit, you'd never see fireworks or pyrotechnics at an E Street Band show, but you would see Mighty Max pounding those drums like his life depended on it! And, you would see Little Steven smiling and clowning around with his friend while they shared the mic.

So, what did I think of the halftime show? Two words: pure joy!

Is Once Enough?

2009-01-31T08:23:00.001-08:00

Very recently, I was sitting around having a conversation with a group of adults and, of course, my so-called obsession with Springsteen and The E Street Band came up. The question came up of why anyone would want to see Bruce more than once. More than once in a lifetime? No. More than once in the same venue, same week, same tour? Yes. I've said this before, "It's like asking a heroin addict, 'Hey, didn't you just shoot up last night?'" That said, I was asked this question: "Isn't it the exact same show as the night before?" In answer to that question, I just found this quote from the E Street Band's great guitarist, Nils Lofgren, in an interview he did promoting tomorrow's half time show. In it he answers the question perfectly:

"This last tour, Bruce kind of... I don't think it was pre-meditated, but the last two months of the tour became complete improv shows where he'd run out in the audience and get, like, 30 signs. Every time he did it I kept thinking, "Here's a college kid rummaging through a pile of clothes looking for a shirt that's clean enough to wear" -- Bruce is just throwing signs around, looking for something to play. By the last few months the setlist almost became useless. He never followed it. There have always been audibles, but there was a theme to it that you could kind of read (the set list) and guess at it pretty well, and that all went out the window. That's what I love about Bruce. He did an all-improv show, but not at the expense of building and having the same kind of emotional peak and energy we always do -- which is very challenging as a bandleader. He really rose to the occasion . . . Someone told me, "Yeah, you played over 160 songs." I don't even keep track. I'm so busy trying to keep my head above water day by day. And it was fun! It was challenging and you learn a lot of tracks, how to make that work in a 10-piece band like that because at some pint you just can't be prepared for audibles. When he calls a song you haven't done in 13 years and you're trying to... Forget how it goes, it's "What instrument do I play?" It makes for a very challenging night for us, in addition to the audience.

No Nomination for "The Wrestler"

2009-01-24T07:08:00.000-08:00

Here is a small piece called How Bruce Springsteen got shut out of the Oscar nominations. I still don't understand it, literally. Help please!

Shot from Sunday's Concert

2009-01-20T20:45:00.000-08:00

This just may be the coolest photo I've ever seen!

We Are One Concert

2009-01-17T14:50:00.001-08:00

Bruce and U2! I cannot wait for this tomorrow!

A third testicle!

2009-01-14T17:48:00.001-08:00

Very good news regarding the new U2 album due March 3rd. Just read this quote from Bono in Rolling Stone. He's talking about one of the songs on the disc:

". . . A hundred fifty beats per minute, three minutes, the fastest song we've ever played. We're not really ready for adult-contemporary just yet."

Apparently the Edge spent time during the past year hanging out with and jamming with Jack White and Jimmy Page while they were making a documentary called IT MIGHT GET LOUD and things have rubbed off!

An even better Bono quote:

"He's developing a third testicle, that's what is happening to the Edge."

Okay, the Edge with even more balls is something I can't wait to hear!

You can click here to find out more about some of the new tracks on No Line On The Horizon.

"Life Itself" Springsteen's official video

2008-12-29T15:58:00.001-08:00

This song just came out. It's off the new album that comes out January 27th. This is a pretty cool song, saying he loves his woman. I like it.

2008 Christmas Letter

2008-12-28T18:04:00.001-08:00

“No man ever steps in the same river twice,

for it’s not the same river and

he’s not the same man.”

--Heraclitus

Change! What else could this Christmas letter be about, but change? You must have followed the election so you know everybody was all for change. Actually, it gave me a chuckle every time Obama or McCain claimed to be for change. I thought, “That’s like being for breathing

. . . it’s coming whether your want it or not.” It’s philosophy 101 really and it’s captured in the above quote from the ancient Greek philosopher Heraclitus. His central doctrine stated that change is central to the universe or panta rhei “everything is in a state of flux.” In other words, change is the only constant. Thus, Nixon brought change, as did Carter, Reagan, and Clinton. It’s good to know our new president is for it because it’s coming! As I look back over this past year in our personal lives as much as nationally, I realize it has indeed been a year of much change.

Our church, TerraNova, finally moved into our new space! This new meeting place for our church is very cool and has been a blessing in so many ways. It has also brought challenges, but it sure has been exciting. Considering that we met in our previous space, a local middle school, for 12 years, I cannot think of a more physical representation of change in our lives. Well, except maybe for our eldest son.

Max is the embodiment of change, developing quite the sense of humor, shooting up in height, outgrowing clothes like mad, and all of a sudden wearing a larger shoe than dad. He is the tallest seventh grader we know. This year Max gave his testimony in front of many people. I’ve personally noticed that he’s said many things lately that show a growing spiritual awareness. He has really gotten into swimming and working out and his body is showing it. Max loves watching movies, all kinds of movies and he has a magnetic personality and a widening circle of friends. He plays the drums and joined the junior high band.

Speaking of drums and bands, Max is now frequently playing along with Wes. The quality of both boys musicianship is another great change this year. They have both taken their instruments very seriously. Wes is, of course, a guitar player and he loves music. Wes has the desire to be a rock star and he’s formed a band. Although the band includes his brother on drums, Wes is clearly the leader and has used his outgoing personality to recruit others friends to join this future endeavor. Reflecting the theme of this letter, the name of Wes’s band has changed more than California’s gas prices this year. It’s gone from “Boys of America” to “Bitter Sunshine” to “Major Lawrence” to “The Bookhouse Boys” to “Four Elements” to “No Vision” and I believe they are called “True Vision” as of this writing. Wes was able to take a solo trip this year to visit his best friend and band manager, Cameron, out in Minnesota, certainly the highlight of his year. Wes is also a swimmer and he shows a tireless energy for the sport as he does for life in general.

Changes in development are obviously not exclusive to our boys. Zoey is now in first grade. As Zoey’s kindergarten teacher once put it, the reading fairy has visited Zoey. She’s reading and writing like crazy and she loves numbers the best. Zoey is quite the social butterfly too. Although she didn’t do it year round like her brothers, Zoey did join the swim team during the summertime. The summer meets provided a time for our family to hang out together on Saturdays and Zoey swam her little heart out. Kasey has a new preschool teacher and is beginning to speak a lot clearer and a just a lot more in general. She likes to break out into spontaneous song, usually with a little ditty she calls, “I love everybody in my family.” Both of our girls are loving and affectionate and I count their unlimited hugs, kisses, drawings, and affirmations as among the greatest treasures of my life.

Chrisy and I have seen our share of change too. Reflecting the economy, several supplemental sources of income seemed to dry up for us. Chrisy is technically still employed at Western Medical Center, but because of budget cuts and low census, she was not getting called in for any shifts for a majority of the year. Together we decided to have our first truly non-materialistic Christmas, cutting back on gifts, mailings, and pressure (this would account for the lateness of this letter as well as, in most cases, the absence of a postage stamp)! There was a lot of change for me at work. After eight years of teaching 3rd grade at the same school site, I was displaced temporarily moved into a non-classroom position that was split between two school sites. I’m now back full time at my original school and I’ve been moved into a 4th grade classroom. I have a wonderful new principal too and the morale is really up at work. It’s actually a fun place to be.

Chrisy’s mom had some health scares this year and has since come to live with us full time. Needless to say adding a seventh person to the mix is a big change, but Sherry has been a blessing to us. This Christmas she bought all of us a Disney cruise! All six of us went with Sherry as well as Chrisy’s brother and his wife on a seven-day cruise of the Western Caribbean. It was fantastic! Back in April during my Spring Break Sherry and a bunch of generous church friends watched the kids and got them off to school while Chrisy and I spent an entire week by ourselves in Sedona, Arizona, a place that’s become a little taste of Heaven for us. I will never forget the day we hiked up Mt. Wilson, an all day hike to the highest point in Sedona. It seems that God really used that trip to help Chrisy and I see how blessed we are. Another trip we didn’t write about last year happened right after we sent out our 2007 Christmas letter. Chrisy and I flew back to Minnesota for an extended winter visit with our friends, the Cloyds. Then, this past March I was able to fly back to Minnesota again by myself. My good friend Tony and I went to a Springsteen concert in St. Paul together. That was another highlight of my year.

Some other highlights that come to mind were: a bed & breakfast weekend in Julian in January with the Taylors and the Cloyds; serving in junior high with Michelle & the Flaggs; Praying with fellow leaders on Good Friday; baptisms at the beach; Max & Wes at their music recitals; seeing John Heffron’s stand-up; going to the Getty Center with a good buddy; Wes running a track relay; Chrisy’s Vegas trip for her friend’s graduation; Max’s 6th grade promotion; Chrisy’s high school reunion; Brad Paisley concert with my mom; Chrisy winning front row Tom Petty tickets and a great new camera; David Crowder at the fair; Max and I at a Matthew Sweet concert; Wes and I seeing Travis at the Troubadour; my sister, Lori, winning Coldplay tickets and taking me; a grueling 5-mile trail run one evening in July; Chrisy’s scrapbooking in Big Bear with a bunch of friends; having our friends stay with us for a week in October; running a 10K in the pouring rain on Thanksgiving Day; and, simply being in community, loving and being loved.

More true to the Heraclitus quote at the opening of this letter, Chrisy and I have made some good changes with our health. I have been extremely proud of Chrisy. This year she joined a boot camp that meets very early in the morning three days a week. She has been dedicated to it and hasn’t quit all year; she has been reaching personal fitness goals. For me it is running that has made me feel like a new man. On my 39th birthday I made a vow to myself that the 365 days between that day and my 40th birthday would be the healthiest—spiritually, mentally, emotionally, and physically—of my life. Since the first of April I’ve ran 700 miles.

It’s hard to quantify spiritual change, but I feel it has really taken place this year. If I had to sum that up I’d have to just say that God is a lot more interested in our character than our comfort. He tends to bring positive change to our character through difficult circumstances. Chrisy and I have had a lot of realizations in 2008. The foremost of them is that the propensity for us humans to sin is frankly much greater than we previously realized; therefore, our need for a savior and abundant grace is also far more crucial than we ever realized. Thus, despite our own occasional and petty problems, this year has seen us pull closer together as a couple and we’ve sought to guard our marriage at all costs.

Internally, I truly don’t feel like I am the same man I was 12 months ago. This year I feel the book “Love Focused” by Bob Hughes helped drive home the most important lesson: God is Enough! Consider this quote: “This critical difference between simply knowing God loves me and believing God’s love and grace are enough can make the difference between obeying God and disobeying him, between growing and not growing as a Christian, between a frustrating and satisfying life.” It is impossible to express just what a difference truly believing God is sufficient can do for one’s mental state. Thus, as I say goodbye to 2008 I find myself in the least “needy” state in my entire life.

Of course, I’d be remiss if I didn’t point out that the only thing that doesn’t change is our Abba in Heaven. He remains the one constant in all of this. May you find Him this Christmas season.

Shalom,

Shenandoah
for all of us: Chrisy, Max, Wes, Zoey, & Kasey
December 2008

This one's in the bag

2008-12-28T07:47:00.000-08:00

I saw Darren Aronofsky's film THE WRESTLER last night. Wow! I just want to say that they can go ahead and engrave the Academy Award for Best Actor in a Leading Role right now. Mickey Rourke has this one in the bag. Yea, I know the nominations are not even decided yet, but this one is his. I have to say I am actually really happy about this too because way back in the 1980s my buddy Matt Jones and I were so into Mickey Rourke. We were like the only two people I knew of who drove to the limited engagement of his film BARFLY in 1987. He had a string of wonderful films like DINER, RUMBLE FISH, THE POPE OF GREENWICH VILLAGE, and ANGEL HEART. I'm happy to see this so-called resurrection of Mickey Rourke. What a performance.

Of course, I'd love to predict a second Oscar for this film, Best Original Song for Bruce Springsteen for the title track. However, I can't be so sure. In my totally biased opinion, it would be a lock; yet, that's what I thought for Dead Man Walking so I'll just wait and see on that one.

Christmas: Everything for Nothing

2008-12-25T08:11:00.000-08:00

"Religion in general is man's strategic manual for how to reach God. But Christianity is not a religion in this sense. Christianity holds that man, no matter how hard he tries, cannot reach God. Man cannot ascend to God's level because God's level is too high. Therefore there is only one remedy: God must come down to man's level. Scandalous though it may seem, God must, quite literally, become man and assume the burden of man's sins. Christians believe that this was the great sacrifice performed by Christ. If we accept Christ's sacrifice on the basis of faith, we will inherit God's gift of salvation. That's it. That is the essence of Christianity. To some it may seem ridiculously simple. In this simplicity, however, there is considerable depth and richness . . . . I want to reflect for a moment on God's incredible sacrifice. I am not referring to Christ's crucifixion. I am referring to God's decision to become man. No other religion can even conceive this. The Greek and Roman gods of antiquity often disguised themselves as mortals, but they would not actually become mortal. Mexican author Carlos Fuentes writes that when the Christian missionaries first presented their doctrines to the Aztecs, the Aztecs were totally uncomprehending. Fuentes writes, 'In a universe accustomed to seeing men sacrificed to the gods, nothing amazed the Indians more than the sight of a god who had sacrificed himself to men.' Yet what other religions hold to be absurd and scandalous, Christianity holds to be true . . . . 'Christ offers us something for nothing,' C.S. Lewis writes. 'He even offers everything for nothing. In a sense, the whole Christian life consists in accepting that very remarkable offer.' So what is the difficulty? The difficulty is in realizing that we are sinful and that there is nothing we can do to solve the problem. A related obstacle is accepting God's authority and His plan for our life. The obstacle, in other words, are those of human pride." --Dinesh D'Souza

Taken from chapter twenty-five, "Jesus Among Other Gods: The Uniqueness of Christianity" from Dinesh D'Souza's book, WHAT'S SO GREAT ABOUT CHRISTIANITY (Regnery, 2007).

Springsteen/Bon Jovi - last night

2008-12-23T13:40:00.001-08:00

In an unbilled and unannounced appearance last night Bruce joined Jon Bon Jovi and others on stage for a benefit show. This was the Hope Concert IV at the Count Basie Theatre in New Jersey. I am posting this so you can see what this man can do even without his band. Just look at the energy and electricity Springsteen creates in this room. Look at the way he starts this song and works the crowd and his stage presence. For those of you that don't know, this is Springsteen's song "Tenth Avenue Freeze-Out."

milestone

2008-12-21T08:37:00.001-08:00

I'm proud of this one:

http://nikeplus.nike.com/nikeplus/v1/html/milestones/print_certif.html?id=1961869126®ion=us&language=en&locale=en_us&dateFormat=MM/DD/YY

Song To Self

2008-12-06T10:43:00.001-08:00

This song just makes me happy. Love the video too.

Running Home

2008-12-05T15:47:00.001-08:00

I had this goal, one year in the making: run home to Lake Forest from work in Santa Ana. I just got home from that run!

My Lucky Day indeed!

2008-12-01T16:05:00.000-08:00

As many of you know, I wasn't too keen on the title track for the forthcoming Bruce Springsteen album, "Working On A Dream." However, this new song out today is amazing! I love it. Also, this video with the cool introduction/making of thing is so totally cool. I'm happy. Click on the link below:

Bruce Springsteen's MY LUCKY DAY

Merry Christmas Baby

2008-11-29T08:24:00.001-08:00

It's official . . . let it begin!

Buy Nothing Day 2008

2008-11-28T08:13:00.001-08:00

Black Friday

2008-11-28T07:41:00.000-08:00

Really loved the Op-Ed piece by Juliet Scher in the LA Times this morning. Titled "Bleak Friday," Scher writes: "Scaling back on gifts and holiday spending this year suddenly seems like the socially acceptable thing to do. Spending liberally can feel unseemly. Even older children will recognize that these are unusual times." She also posits this question: "Facing such financial uncertainty, who would buy a new car, TV, stereo, or sofa?"

My favorite part though is this: "Don't feel guilty about it. We can find better ways to support one another than funneling our money through giant multinationals in hopes that some trickles down to its employees . . . . I suggest more music, less wrapping paper."

Having just sent out an open letter to our families about no longer buying Christmas gifts, this article by Juliet Scher was received as a welcomed surprise this morning.

Thus, in honor (or in spite of) Black Friday, check out these sites:

Adbusters Buy Nothing Day
Advent Conspiracy
Rethinking Christmas
Debt-Proof Living/Cheapskate Monthly
Make Something Day
The Center for a New American Dream

Cloudburst

2008-11-27T16:27:00.000-08:00

Running through the rain

I put my ear to my chest

and heard the righteous pounding

of the song to self

beating out an anthem of

thanksgiving

the sideways torrent

unleashed an avalanche of

praise

rather than dwell in these

"difficult times"

I found myself lost in the

miracle of my functional body

the glory of

salvation

every breath I drew

reminded me of

freedom

my escape from death's grip

sweet rain on my tongue

a refreshing reminder of

God's provision

Turkey Trot

2008-11-27T16:06:00.001-08:00

I ran the Dana Point 10K Turkey Trot this morning. I am quite pleased with my results. I ended up doing it in 43:20 which was a pace of 6:59. I was 19th out of 207 dudes in my age group, 35-39 years old. I had said I would run it with an eight minute mile pace so I am feeling good. Thankful today that God gave me two legs that are working okay at the moment.

Coldplay Concert

2008-11-26T00:48:00.001-08:00

I just got home from the Coldplay concert and I am on another live music high. I must say the concert totally exceeded all my expectations. I was quite moved by the entire performance and I walked away from tonight a MUCH BIGGER admirer of Coldplay than before. I just "liked them" before tonight, but I am now a full-blown fan.

My sister Lori Ann won tickets to the show on the radio station 98.7 FM and the prize included the "Viva La Meeta and Greeta" with the band, we got a group photo, and we got to hear their soundcheck which was extremely cool! Can you believe she was nice enough to take me?! Wow! Even though all these band photos are from the soundcheck and not the actual show, I'm going to just write about the main show here.Here is the set list from tonight:

LIFE IN TECHNICOLOR
VIOLET HILL
CLOCKS
IN MY PLACE
SPEED OF SOUND
CEMETERIES OF LONDON
CHINESE SLEEP CHANT
42
FIX YOU
STRAWBERRY SWING
GOD PUT A SMILE UPON YOUR FACE/
TALK (both techno style)
THE HARDEST PART (Chris/piano instrumental)
POSTCARDS FROM FAR AWAY (Chris/piano instrumental)
VIVA LA VIDA
LOST!
THE SCIENTIST (acoustic)
DEATH WILL NEVER CONQUER (Will singing acoustic)
VIVA LA VIDA (remix interlude)
POLITIK
LOVERS IN JAPAN
DEATH AND ALL HIS FRIENDS
YELLOW
THE ESCAPIST (outro)

I thought that was an amazing set list. I think LIFE IN TECHNICOLOR was such a strong opener. I adore that song and from the very first notes the vibe was upbeat and cheerful. Right off the bat, during the very first song, I loved how the guys joined together and played off each other. It's almost like they huddled, not too spread out. They did this frequently and Chris especially just seemed to be having fun and taking it all in and very appreciative that he could play to us. As a whole the music was quite beatific and it just made me feel jubilant.

I think my very favorite highlight of the night was FIX YOU. I know I tend to be emotional, but this one caught me by surprise as the lyrics just hit me and I found myself eyes closed praying to God and running through people I know by name, myself included, and asking God to fix them. By the time the song got to the musical high point and Chris was sing "Tears stream down your face" over and over, I actually had tears streaming down my face. It was surreal. It truly was a spiritual moment for me.

Honestly when they got to VIVA LA VIDA, that was such a show-stopper that I couldn't imagine that they weren't done. I thought they surely had to end the show after that. It was so fantastic, everybody dancing and singing. Such a great moment.The encore was amazing too. I thought POLITIK was awesome and LOVERS IN JAPAN just brought the house down. I was so joyful during LOVERS IN JAPAN and then they dropped thousands and thousands of colorful pieces of confetti and we were dancing, singing, and jumping and I looked over at my sister and honestly said, "This is as close to heaven on earth as it gets for me." YELLOW as the final encore was perfect. It was so perfect I knew that had to be the last song.It really is wrong to single out those songs because everything was so good. CEMETERIES OF LONDON and LOST! laid me out and I was struck by the loveliness of STRAWBERRY SWING which hit me as a very Beatlesque song tonight. Chris had me cracking up laughing during THE HARDEST PART which he sang from the B-stage as he added a verse about how difficult it was to see The Jonas Brothers being so young while he is so old. Also during that song I noticed what a great job Will the drummer did singing back-up vocals. Beautiful really. I was also totally surprised that all four of the guys got down off the stage at the Honda Center and walked down the isles to the rear of the venue and then walked up stairs to the lodge area (200 level) and sang two acoustic songs from there. I have never seen that in such a large arena before. Totally cool thing.
The sound was amazing tonight and the lighting was cool. They had full on lasers on SPEED OF SOUND for example, really a first class production all the way around. I totally enjoyed myself. It was a treat to be with my sister and catch up and we both danced a lot. I think they played literally everything I really wanted to hear.

Another thing that made tonight cool was that I loved the first opening band. It was a group of five young guys from Texas called Sleeper Car and I was totally into their music. They reminded me of a cross between Social Distortion, The Jayhawks, and The E Street Band. Very seldom have I enjoyed an opening act so much as these guys.

Now I am very tired, but I am thinking currently thinking about how Chis Martin embodies the saying, "Dance as if no one is watching" as he just skips around and has a grand time. I want to skip a bit more today for sure!

I'm running . . .

2008-11-22T09:45:00.000-08:00

because I can

because I want to

because I'm made to

Confinement

2008-11-20T20:05:00.000-08:00

Imagine my dismay

When I awoke today

To find that I had

Misplaced my passion

Trapped in my own desires

My childhood dreams

Had become my prison

I wanted escape

From it all . . .

Run from responsibilities

Hide from friends

Vacation from work

Give up the charity work

Abandon the "sacred union"

Even hide from God

It all seemed like such a burden

Blessings and all

Nowhere to run

Obligations burning

Bright as the sun

Where did it go

That fire in my soul?

Why do I feel so

Out of control?

Do I even believe

In a soul?

And, who is this stranger in the mirror?

Closer

2008-11-19T06:14:00.001-08:00

PLEASE NOTE THAT THIS VIDEO IS STILL POSTED ON YOUTUBE, IT IS JUST NO LONGER EMBEDDED; THUS, YOU WILL HAVE TO SIMPLY CLICK ON THE LINK BELOW.

Here's the official Travis video for CLOSER, one of the songs I wrote about in my previous post. I thought you might enjoy hearing the studio version. Like I wrote yesterday, when the song came out in 2007, I liked it, but I didn't love it. Now, I adore this song. It really touches me. It's from the album THE BOY WITH NO NAME. If the above video doesn't work just go strait here: CLOSER. This really is a simple song, but quite the lovely sentiment in my opinion. I do think this is a pretty cool video too. Also, here are the lyrics as well.

CLOSER

I've had enough
of this parade
I'm thinking of
the words to say
We open up
unfinished parts
Broken up
it's only love

And when I see you then I know
it will be next to me
And when I need you then I know
you will be there with me
I'll never leave you

Just need to get closer, closer
Lean on me now
Lean on me now
Closer, closer
Lean on me now
Lean on me now

Keep waking up (waking up)
without you here (without you here)
another day (another day)
another year (another year)
I seek the truth (seek the truth)
We set apart (we set apart)
Second dance
Second chance (a second chance)

And when I see you then I know
it will be next to me
And when I need you then I know
you will be there with me
I'll never leave you

Just need to get closer, closer
Lean on me now
Lean on me now
Closer, closer
Lean on me now
Lean on me now
Lean on me now

And when I see you then I know
it will be next to me
And when I need you then I know
you will be there with me
I'll never leave you

Just need to get closer, closer
Lean on me now
Lean on me now
Closer, closer
Lean on me now
Lean on me now
Lean on me now

Closer, closer
Closer, closer

Travis Euphoria

2008-11-18T20:28:00.000-08:00

Guitarist Andy Dunlop climbs the scaffolding

(photo by Timothy Norris of LA Weekly)

Okay, so it was one week ago tonight I was at the Travis show. Yes, I used the word "euphoria" when I tried to explain that night's Travis concert. Euphoria is a noun that means "a feeling of general well-being" and that is exactly what I experienced at that concert at the Troubadour. I love this band. I have seen literally several hundred concerts in my life and I can honestly say that Travis lands somewhere in my top three shows. Of course, I consider Springsteen the greatest live experience ever and I would put U2 right up there because their live show also feels like a spiritual experience, but I had such a high last Tuesday that I honestly cannot even just say that Travis third. Wes has never seen U2, but he has seen Springsteen and, as we left last night he said, "That was the best concert I have ever seen. It was better than Bruce, it was better than David Crowder, it was better than all the others." Some of the others he had seen were John Densmore's band Tribal Jazz, Stray Cats, ZZ Top, Stevie Nicks, and The Pretenders. We both agreed that the best of those seemed like a joke in comparrison to what we saw last night at the very small club known as The Troubadour.

There is so much to say about the Travis show, but let me just go back to the spiritual aspect again and this concept of a feeling of general well-being. As good as the band is at playing their instruments, for as much as the boys rock, for as much joy as just fist pumping, jumping-up-and-down rock 'n' roll brings, I think what I adore the most about Travis is the wonderful, kind, soul-searching, "I want to be a better man" thread that runs through most of the music that Fran, the main songwriter, has blessed us with. What I realized even more as I stood there leaning against the stage last Tuesday night is that I love writers like Springsteen, Neil Finn, Bono, and Fran because, they connect to my heart, they want the same things I want. Their music actually makes the world a better place.

Bass player Dougie Payne

(this is a photo I took as nothing was between

Wes and I and the stage)

Let me give some specific examples from last night. First, Wes and I were literally pushing up against the stage so when the roadie came and taped the set list to the floor, I could see it. I was thinking I shouldn't look because it would take away the element of surprise. But, being a compulsive person, I had to look. As I ran down the songs there were, of course, songs I immediately thought, "Oh, I am looking forward to that one."

However, perhaps my favorite moment in the show came during a group of songs where I had not anticipated being blown away.

Neil Primrose pounding away on the drums

(Photo by Timothy Norris of LA Weekly)

The reason for this is that I was looking at songs thinking, "That is gonna rock" or "Andy will shred on that one" or "Neil is going to pound the heck out of the drums on that one" or "I can't wait to hear Dougie's baseline on that one" or "Frans vocals will just rule on that song" and all those things totally happened. However, the most important moment for me in the show came as a total EMOTIONAL response, it was an extended moment that laid this feeler out with a one-two-three sucker punch to the heart.

Lead singer Fran Healy comes off the stage to make an emotional

connection and sings among the audience during "Falling Down"

(photo by Timothy Norris of LA Weekly)

What I am talking about is what I now call the "trifecta of desire." I got blindsided by two unexpected selections and then reduced to jello by the triple-whammy of an old favorite that I had taken for granted. The first song that I was really surprised by my response on was a song called CLOSER off THE BOY WITH NO NAME ALBUM. I really really love that album from 2007, and I liked the song CLOSER, but I wasn't blown away by it . . . . until I was standing there and the lyrics blew threw me like a gentle breeze and I realized this was everything I wanted and I begin thinking about Chrisy and then I just felt tears streaming down my face as I watched in awe of the band. Consider a sampling of these lyrics from CLOSER:

"And when I see you then I know it will be next to me

And when I need you then

I know you will be there with me

I'll never leave you

Just need to get closer, closer

Lean on me new, lean on me now . . . . "

I know that chorus will not move you to where I was that night, but at the concert, the song hit me in a very powerful way, so powerful that I cannot put it into words. For me, that performance of CLOSER spoke to my desire to be even more at one with my wife.

Then came the big surprise off the new album ODE TO J. SMITH. Prior to that night I had told Wes that I loved the album so much I had a 7-way tie for my favorite song off the 11-song album: "I loved seven songs and just liked four songs." He asked which four I "only liked" and one of them was BEFORE YOU WERE YOUNG. That is the song that followed CLOSER at our concert and it was the perfect emotional follow-up and it was like I had never heard the song before. Check out this sampling of lyrics from BEFORE YOU WERE YOUNG:

"But even then we're never safe

From danger

And if you ever need me call

I will be there waiting

When you fall

You know I will

I'll love you forever

I'll never say never . . . ."

Wes and I right after the show right at the spot we were watching the show from

As this song was playing, in the way CLOSER had made me think of Chrisy, this song made me think of my children. At one point I even leaned over and kissed Wes on the head and gave him a pat on the back. In that moment the song spoke to my desire to be the best dad possible for my four children.

I was eating out of the band's hands. And, after that, came pure bliss, an old favorite TURN, but even that one seemed to hit me like never before. It was a song about spiritual longing and wrapped up all my desires. Here's a sampling of TURN:

"I want to feel like I felt before

I want to see the kingdom come

I want to feel forever young

I want to sing

To sing my song

I want to live in a world where I belong

I want to live

I will survive . . . . "

It was fantastic. This song was about the desire to truly live! TURN closed out the show on an emotional high as it was the end of the main set. It was pure . . . Euphoria!

During "Flowers in the Window" the whole band got together;

here Dougie is playing Fran's guitar while Fran sings

(I took this photo)

When the band came back for the encore, after two covers, Fran again turned to this type of song that simply makes me feel good. He brought all the band out to the edge of the stage and they sang FLOWERS IN THE WINDOW. One of their bigger hits, the song was written about his pregnant wife. It too filled me with love, peace, and joy. Here are some lyrics:

"When I first held you I was cold

A melting snowman I was told

But there was no-one there to hold

Before I swore that I would be alone forever more

Wow, look at you now

Flowers in the window

Its such a lovely day

And I'm glad you feel the same

Cos you stand up, out in the crowd

You are one in a million

And I love you so

Let's watch the flowers grow . . . . "

Such a lovely day indeed.

I reached a running goal

2008-11-18T20:10:00.000-08:00

Wes and Travis

2008-11-12T02:58:00.000-08:00

I'm very tired from a very remarkable night at the Troubadour. Travis put on one amazing show. All I can say right now is I am experiencing pure euphoria right now. Here's a photo of Wes and the band. We had such a great night. I will be back to write more about this show. What a night! Got to go to sleep though.

That overrated fiscal responsibility thing . . .

2008-11-10T15:42:00.000-08:00

Just in case you wonder why I am not a Republican. Arnold is supposedly a Republican, right? Here is a quote from him just the other day:

"I think the important thing for the Republican Party is now to also look at other issues that are very important for this country and not to get stuck in ideology," the governor said in an interview broadcast on CNN. "Let's go and talk about healthcare reform. Let's go and . . . fund programs if they're necessary programs and not get stuck just on the fiscal responsibility."

Nice to know the governor things fiscal responsibility is a bad place to be stuck.

Max barfing at the junior high all-nighter

2008-11-09T19:29:00.000-08:00

This one speaks for itself.

Happy Halloween

2008-10-31T10:39:00.000-07:00

Here's a picture of me with the new medallion that I just picked up at Diagon Alley! Happy Halloween. --Hagrid

Beautiful Past

2008-10-21T20:35:00.000-07:00

Could it be
the troubles we shared
have set us free?
Refined by what we bore
the shape of our trials
formed this familiar contour of love
Pain and conflict eroded shame
chipping away brokenness
until you fit I and I fit you . . .
Like a glove

--Shenandoah Lynd

Travis Beatles Cover

2008-10-18T09:43:00.001-07:00

Just cuz.

Who is Truth?

2008-10-02T17:54:00.001-07:00

I'm very grateful for this blogger who is posting simply as "Truth," but I don't know who you are! I love getting comments! Seriously, this person gave me like ten comments over two days on various posts. Who are you?

For the rest of you, back on November 8, 2007, I did a post titled The Full Extent. It was about John 13:1-17. Well, "Truth" gave a really detailed reply and sort of rebuttal to that post and I thought I would just post that comment and open this up for further discussion. Let me say up front that I do NOT have a problem with my pastor, John's teaching. However, I thought I would open this up for others to read. If this type of thing floats your boat then why not open up the Bible and read that passage, read my original post, and then read this comment that I have reposted here:

Doah - first, I want you to know I appreciate your genuinely humble spirit as it regards this passage of Scripture. There's no doubt in my mind that your desire is to live in humility as Christ's servant.

With that said, however, I was there the day that John Reed gave this message and, though I've kept silent for a long time regarding this, I have many concerns regarding John's teaching that day...

1 - Like so many of the other examples of love throughout the NT, Christ's demonstration of humility was intended (at the simplest level) to demonstrate how we, as Christians are to love one another. I'm not suggesting that we're not to love anyone else - but this passage in John 13 wasn't about serving anyone/everyone... it was about humility toward fellow brothers and sisters. If we don’t show love to one another first – as members of Christ’s body – any effort to show love to others cannot bear much, if any, fruit. This reminds me of John’s take on Acts 2 last year – when he described the church as being ‘more concerned with those outside than with those inside’. This wasn’t an accurate translation then, either – the reason that the early followers of Christ sold their belongings (2:45) was to provide for the needs of those inside the body of believers. If they were as ‘outwardly-focused’ as John would have had us believe, then their actions would have been for those outside the body. Here in the Gospel of John, it’s the same thing – Jesus is demonstrating His humility and willingness to serve – and telling us to do the same – because it’s how He wants us as believers to treat one another.

2 – As I was studying this passage in John (the apostle, not the pastor) at home after the service, I noticed that John (the pastor, not the apostle) skipped over vv. 6-11 in his sermon. In taking the passage as a whole, I can only surmise that the reason he did this was because this is the KEY section of the passage and it clearly indicates that the entire foot-washing illustration is, primarily, a parable – in deeds rather than words – regarding forgiveness. How else can you explain Jesus’ statement to Peter - “If I do not wash you, you have no share with me”? Once Peter recognizes this is what Christ is talking about, he responds with the "extreme" reply of requesting a washing (i.e. forgiveness) of his whole self. Clearly, Jesus is talking about the forgiveness of sins – His statement that “you are clean, but not every one of you” directly refers to Judas, as v.18 also makes clear - “I am not speaking of all of you; I know whom I have chosen.” This aspect of the passage was not discussed at all – and the fact that the relevant verses were skipped over reveals (in my opinion) the mixed-up priority of Jesus as example, rather than Christ as Savior. Sadly, however, this is not untypical of the teaching I've experienced there. More importantly, it reveals John's unfortunate willingness to manipulate Scripture passages in order to prove his particular point. Pastors ought to let the Scripture speak through them, rather than making the Scriptures speak for them.

3 - Let's go back for a moment to Jesus' last statement in v. 18... "I am not speaking of all of you; I know whom I have chosen." I know it's been awhile, but do you recall John telling us that if you do this (i.e. acts of humble service), you'll be blessed? He based this on v. 17, "If you know these things, blessed are you if you do them." However, he neglected to point out the clear exception in v. 18 - only those whom Christ has chosen will be blessed as described in v.17. Now, without getting into the whole election/free-will debate (which I am not qualified to discuss), this verse makes abundantly clear that those who are not believers will not be “blessed” by doing this. Given John’s acknowledgment to me (multiple times) that many in our congregation are not (yet) believers, he would be wise to remind them that this promised blessing only applies to those who belong to Christ – and what a perfect opportunity that would be to encourage folks to come to Christ! What happens if one of these non-believing attendees took this “great gamble” but did not “feel blessed” at the end of the month (as John assured they would)? Are they to discard the word of God as not being true? Or should they rather have been taught that this promise does not apply to them until they are believers?

4 - In the study guide related to this sermon, John instructs us to “ask God to forgive and cleanse [us] specifically of any regrets or guilt [we’re] carrying today". Why does he so strenuously avoid the mere mention - let alone any discussion or teaching - of sin? Presumably, you know Scripture well enough to know that it is not our regrets, but our sin for which Christ died – thus demonstrating God’s righteous and just nature, while simultaneously revealing his mercy and love. I don’t know about you, Doah, but I still have plenty of “regrets” for sins that I committed in my youth – they haven’t been removed... partially, I suspect, because God uses those regrets to remind me not to head down that path of sin. (With all due respect, things may have changed at TerraNova since the time I eventually left - but this was a constant issue - or non-issue, technically speaking - while I was there.)

5 – Even if the suggestion was somewhat tongue-in-cheek, it is entirely inappropriate that the pastor suggested we follow the sinful path of self-gratification if we don’t find that following the righteous path of self-sacrifice leads to blessing. Why would a spiritual leader recommend this action? Analogy: “Worship God entirely and completely for one month – if you don’t find yourself blessed for doing so... feel free to worship another god during the next month.” Or, “Be faithful to your spouse for a month, but if you don’t find yourself blessed... try someone else the following month.” Why in the world would John honestly suggest that we follow a sinful, self-indulgent path if we don’t find ourselves blessed after one single month? In my opinion, this shows a lack of discernment – especially in light of concern #3 regarding unbelievers. Combine these two and you’ll see what I mean. (And if you don't remember his little "challenge", go listen to the podcast.)

6 – Finally, there was no mention of the power of the Holy Spirit indwelling in us that enables us to live beyond ourselves – it is only as we crucify our sinful nature and allow the Holy Spirit to lead us that we will ever truly desire to live self-sacrificially. The absence of this teaching leads naturally to the conclusion that we can – and should! - do this on our own. Once again, the spectre of works-based faith raises its Pelagian head and it becomes more evident that John isn't teaching a full-bodied, complete, Christianity. I believe that you and John – and most of TerraNova, for that matter – believe that salvation comes by grace alone through faith alone in Christ alone... but I never heard that taught. Not once. So, if I’m a nonbeliever, and I heard that message, I would go out and do good things out of a desire to be acceptable to God. That’s a fatal trap, though, and we all know it... why doesn't your pastor teach it?

I realize this was a HUGE post - longer than some of yours, even - but I hope you took the time to read it carefully. This wasn't an attack on John - I love him as a brother in Christ. This was a clarification on John 13 that needed to be made by someone on the pastoral team... but wasn't.

Super Bowl

2008-09-29T06:12:00.001-07:00

Finally, the rumors are true! Suddenly, I care about a football game or at least half-time! How many days are there until February 1st? Tampa is gonna be rockin'!

Five Sentence Tribute: Paul Newman

2008-09-27T08:12:00.000-07:00

A truly good human and first rate American citizen who gave millions to charity and helped countless children through both his Newman's Own Foundation and his Hole In The Wall Camps. His Newman's Own products are fabulous, especially the Salt and Pepper Pretzels, Lemonade, and chocolate bars! He was married to his second wife, Joanne Woodward for 50 years, an anniversary I'd like to achieve. I could go on and on about his great acting and the dozens of fantastic movies, but I'll just say that NOBODY'S FOOL from 1994 is one of the best movies I have seen and, despite the many classics this man starred in, his character Sully Sullivan in that film remains my personal favorite. Paul Newman was always just the coolest, I mean just look at that photo above and you'll understand why, as a boy, I can remember seeing him and thinking "Now, there's a man I'd like to be like."

Previous Five Sentence Tributes:

Jerry Reed
George Carlin
Tim Russert
Sydney Pollack
Charlton Heston
Paul Scofield
Roy Scheider
Heath Ledger
Dan Fogelberg
Brad Delp
Peter Boyle
Robert Altman
Jack Palance

Street Poet

2008-09-25T23:05:00.000-07:00

Okay, sorry I've been absent. What have I got for you? Well, just another Bruce post. I cannot help it. A friend of mine recently pointed this out to me, and I quote:
"I swear, Bruce has got to be the king of 'street poetry,' he is AMAZING, his lyrics create an instant video in your head, once which the LISTENER casts and directs-it's that simple!"
Okay, read that quote again, because my buddy is dead on! Funny, but for decades he wasn't into Bruce. Even though he gave me an example from a different song, I want to share lyrics that have been doing that EXACT thing for me. If you own THE RISING album then play the song "The Fuse" right now and listen to it, see what video runs in your head as you listen to the poetry. If you don't own it, check out these lyrics below. What do they do for you? I know that I have a whole scenario in my mind when I hear them. I don't really want to give my interpretation just yet because I will influence you, but here are the lyrics to one of my favorite songs:

"The Fuse"
by Bruce Springsteen
from the album THE RISING (2002)

Down at the court house they're ringin' the flag down
Long black line of cars snakin' slow through town
Red sheets snappin' on the line
With this ring will you be mine
The fuse is burning
Shut out the lights
The fuse is burning
Come on let me do you right

Trees on fire with the first fall's frost
Long black line in front of Holy Cross
Blood moon risin' in a sky of black dust
Tell me Baby who do you trust?
The fuse is burning
Shut out the lights
The fuse is burning
Come on let me do you right

Tires on the highway hissin' that something's coming
You can feel the wires in the tree tops hummin'
Devil's on the horizon line
Your skin and I'm alive

Quiet afternoon in the empty house
On the edge of the bed you slip off your blouse
The room is burning with the noon sun
Your bittersweet taste on my tongue
The fuse is burning
Shut out the lights
The fuse is burning
Come on let me do you right

My City of Ruins, my 9/11 post

2008-09-11T18:01:00.001-07:00

There is no better way for me to remember the events of seven years ago than to post the above clip from Bruce Springsteen. I remember the day this aired. I remember weeping. This particular performance still gives me goosebumps. It would be about a year later that Springsteen released his masterpiece album called THE RISING on which this song appears. THE RISING came out on July 30, 2002, and I have commemorated every September 11th by listening to the album. I honestly could write a ten-thousand word essay on the album and what it means to me, how it helped me process the single most horrific event of my generation. It always makes me feel more connected to the human race every time I meet somebody who actually gets, I mean really gets, that album, how beautifully crafted it is, how the themes of love, loss, hope, and still loving, run all through it, how the image of ascension is so masterfully woven through it. Honestly, there is no way to articulate what I feel in my soul listening to it.

This morning, over breakfast, Max asked me where I was that morning seven years ago. Much to my surprise I couldn't get through the story without crying again. I feel so sorry when I think of all the sons, daughters, friends, moms, dads, heroes, children of God who lost their lives that day. Thinking of the rescue workers who risked or lost their lives that day makes me want to live better. As I write this I am filled with gratitude. I am thankful for the freedoms and privileges that I have in this greatest country ever to grace planet Earth. As I hung my American flag today I thought of the brave men and women in our military and I am so thankful for them and all those who came before them.

"Come on rise up!" indeed.

Bob Barr on FOX

2008-09-10T16:57:00.001-07:00

This moment with Bob Barr on Neil Cavuto's FOX News show aired on 09/08/2008. Barr may not be popular, but he sure is sensible.

Jerry Reed: Five Sentence Tribute

2008-09-03T00:01:00.001-07:00

Cledus "Snowman" Snow rules! I mean who doesn't like SMOKEY AND THE BANDIT? If you've not seen THE SURVIVORS (1983) rent it now. "Guitar Man" is one of the great songs ever! If "East Bound and Down" is all he left it would be enough for me!

The Jayhawks - Waiting for the Sun

2008-09-01T18:37:00.001-07:00

This is one of my favorite bands of all-time. This video is from 1992. It was shot in Minnesota. If you've not heard of The Jayhawks I say you check them out. So why post this now? My son e-mailed me the link and I just got way into the groove! Such a great record. Enjoy!

Abstention

2008-08-31T16:16:00.001-07:00

Once I did not write
25 days
Fasting from the pen
A duration
Commemorating your life
Short, but
Impactful
Seldom live
As well as you dared
With strength and courage
Calling us into action
Demanding that we
Truly live
Each moment abundantly
Not a day has passed
Without my thoughts turning to you
That long walk from
A dark car to your grave
The image of you
In your father's arms
Reminds me of your
Huge life and the
Love you gave

--Shenandoah Lynd

The Hottest Race

2008-08-03T08:26:00.001-07:00

Here's something crazy: The Badwater Ultramarathon! A 135 mile race through California's Death Valley where the temperatures get up to 126 degrees during the race! Click here to see a 1 minute, 37 second Yahoo! News video. Amazing stuff.

Whole Lotta Shakin' Going On

2008-07-30T11:32:00.000-07:00

That sure was exciting yesterday. We had a moderate earthquake here in the greater Los Angeles basin! I heard they downgraded it from a 5.8 to a 5.4 though. I was at work when it occured at 11:42 in the morning. The epicenter was located in Chino Hills which is only about 16 miles from the school I work at in Santa Ana. Of course, being at an elementary school, we had to have the students get down under the desk and all that. Some of the parents chose to come pick-up their kids early too. I've gotten to where earthquakes don't scare me too much, but of course now we're all thinking about the so-called "Big One" again. So, did you feel it?

Milestone

2008-07-30T10:05:00.000-07:00

So, I've been using this cool Nike+ gadget since July 5, 2008. There is a small chip that goes inside your shoe and it communicates with the Nike+ SportBand on my wrist. I really like it. If you are a runner I recommend it to you. I like that it helps me keep a training log, actually it doesn't "help" as much as it does it for you. I like that it is an asset in providing motivation. And, I like that it cultivates camaraderie in a big way. For instance, I have this since that I am running "with" my friends Tony and Julie Cloyd in Minnesota even though distance separates us!

I hit an important milestone with my Nike+ yesterday! You can click here to see the certificate. I am proud to have logged 100 miles in July alone!

Penitence

2008-07-30T08:07:00.000-07:00

I remember that cool evening
under the moss-draped banyan trees,
how the roots grew downward
to the ground to form new trunks.
I was there only once, yet I'll
never forget it. I neglected to tell you
how lovely you looked. I knew you
would have brushed it off, but I
should have affirmed you anyway.
The clarity was magical and
nothing's made that much sense,
before or since.
Even the immense waves
pounding against the cliffs couldn't
match the power of love
unleashed within my heart.
Would the confession, "I don't ever
want to be without you" really have
made me too vulnerable?
I read that they chopped down the
banyan trees. They're gone
forever, like you. For a price,
rich men golf upon the cliff,
contrasting with poverty in my heart,
the utter bankruptcy of my soul.

--Shenandoah Lynd

Latourette Quote

2008-07-29T12:22:00.000-07:00

"Not immediately, but as the months and years passed, increasingly, from experience and thought based on extensive reading, I found the Evangelical faith in which I had been reared confirmed and deepened. Increasingly I rejoiced in the Gospel -- the amazing Good News -- that the Creator of what to us human beings is this bewildering and unimaginably vast universe, so loved the world that He gave His only Son, that whosoever believes in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life. Everlasting life, I came to see, is not just continued existence, but a growing knowledge -- not merely intellectual but wondering through trust, love, and fellowship -- of Him who alone is truly God, and Jesus Christ whom He has sent."

--Kenneth Scott Latourette

I really love that quote. The more I read it, the more I love it.

sonship

2008-07-25T08:44:00.000-07:00

. . . . because those who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, "Abba, Father." The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God's children. Now if we are children, then we are heirs--heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory.

--Romans 8:14-17

Okay, so I decided to look up sonship in the dictionary because it's not a word we use a lot. It says:

sonship--(noun) the relationship of son to father

This is remarkable to me! I am a co-heir with Christ! I am a son of God!

Look, okay, so I knew this already, but I highly suggest you read the above passage from Romans again right now, like maybe a half-dozen times. Why the heck haven't I been celebrating more? Doesn't this make you want to go out and buy a bouquet of helium-filled mylar balloons or something? You know, maybe a large heart one in the center that reads "Congratulations on your adoption!" or something. I know usually one would expect to give such a party favor to the new parents, but, in this case, clearly, I deserve the balloons!

Fifteen Years

2008-07-24T08:30:00.000-07:00

As I've shared before, Chrisy and I got married on July 24, 1993. It is 15 years ago today! I know it's a cliche, but I can't believe 15 years have gone by. I still remember leaving on our honeymoon like it was yesterday. I remember how hopeful and in love I felt. I wrote the poem "Life Flight" on the plane. Today has me thinking even farther back. I remember all the memories of dating. My poem "Carousel" recounts one such memory. And, although this too is somewhat of a hackneyed phrase, I'm going to say it: I love Chrisy more today than ever! It's really true. I'm so glad Chrisy agreed to say, "I do."

This anniversary seems very special to me, not because 15 is a "biggie" either; rather, it's because of the season my marriage is in. Had you told me in 1994, 1995, 1996, indeed any of the years past, that my marriage could be this good I would not have believed you. A couple years ago I posted a song titled "Thank You For A Life" and that song certainly applies to how I feel about Chrisy Ann Lynd today. I do have so much to thank Chrisy for.

I'm not sure anybody that knows me, friends or family, really know the extent of how much Chrisy has helped me. I literally wouldn't be the man I am today without her support. She has done so many things for me that fall under the category of emotional support. For example, she spurred me on to finish college. Yes, in theory I had always "wanted" to have a graduate degree; however, I'm not certain I would have done anything about it. As much as I hate to admit it, there is a possibility that I might still be working at my father's law office, piddling around at a community college. It is amazing to me to look back and see the way Chrisy encouraged me to get my A.A., B.A., and M.A. degrees. What a journey that was. In all of my life nobody has said, "You can do it!" to me more than Chrisy.

We have had a lot of difficulties along the way, but I finally really understand what James meant when he wrote this: "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything" (James 1:2-4). Most of all I think I have to thank Chrisy for persevering with me and for me and for refusing to stay stagnant. When I read that verse, I actually feel mature and as I sit and reflect upon my anniversary, on my marriage, I have this thought, "I am complete. I am truly not lacking anything. Thank you God for my wife!"

Happy Anniversary my love!

You're Free! Live Like It!

2008-07-22T08:01:00.000-07:00

I have been reading through Romans again. This morning I was reading chapter 6 and it is really full of some remarkable statements by Paul. For some reason verses 13 and 14 are really standing out to me right now. Here is the part I am chewing on:

". . . offer yourselves to God, as those who have been brought from death to life; and offer the parts of your body to him as instruments of righteousness. For sin shall not be your master, because you are not under law, but under grace."

So, I am wondering if anybody wants to chime in on this: In your mind, what does THAT look like? What are the practical implications of offering the parts of your body to God as instruments of righteousness? I'm wondering if we verbally have to say, "God, I give you my body to use as your instrument." Then, after offering it up, what do you DO?

Really that little section is just amazing. If you read the verses that come before it, Paul is saying that our old self was crucified just like Jesus was and we are no longer slaves to sin because we died with Christ and we live with Christ. Sin is not our master! He is indicating here that we can literally live without sinning! Read it again:

"For sin shall not be your master, because you are not under law, but under grace."

I wonder if we really want that? Do I want that? If I do, then why am I not insisting on it? Later, in verse 18, Paul writes:

"You have been set free from sin and have become slaves to righteousness."

When I read that I think about the Thirteenth Amendment to the United States Constitution. Ratified on December 6, 1865, it stated that slavery or involuntary servitude could no longer exist within the United States. I remember reading about or hearing a speaker mention that many slaves didn't live any different on December 7, 1865! Why? Well, if you were a slave, not free, and you either didn't get news of your freedom or didn't believe it, then how would you live?

Think about this, President Lincoln actually issued two executive orders that made up the Emancipation Proclamation. The first proclamation on September 22, 1862, freed all the slaves in the Confederate. Then, on January 1, 1863, the second one named the specific states where it applied. So, free people were living as slaves in between from 9/22/1862 to 1/1/1863. What's worse, despite this, slavery wasn't really ended until 12/6/1865 with the 13th Amendment! What's the point of this?

The point is that this is us! It's you and me! We sit around waiting for our freedom when it has been granted! We pray pathetic prayers like this, "God, help me not to sin please." He already did help us! Or, "God, please forgive me." He has already forgiven you so stop living like you're in bondage and waiting for it to happen! I recently told the junior highers at church that this type of thinking is like me praying over and over, "God, please make me a male, a really want to be a male. Can you please make me a male?" If you heard me praying that, you would think I was crazy! God must think that of us because we are TOTALLY forgiven and TOTALLY set free from sin, we just choose not to accept the gift of freedom. Just look at verse 14 again, it says we are under grace. What a lovely term "under grace" is!

Toward the end of the chapter Paul writes, "But now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves to God, the benefit you reap leads to holiness" (verse 22). This is not future tense, as in "When you are set free." Rather, it is past tense, "Now that you have been set free." Wow! I am a slave to God and the Bible actually assumes that, as maturing Christians, we are reaping a benefit and we are becoming holy!

The whole of chapter 6 blows my mind. Seriously, I think one could do an entire study on this one chapter alone. Instead of moving on to chapter 7, I think I will reread chapter 6 tomorrow.

Webb's 3:57 Mile

2008-07-21T10:33:00.000-07:00

This is one of the coolest things I have ever seen: Alan Webb running a 3:57.83 mile at Furman University, South Carolina.This happened way back on April 7, 2007. Roger Bannister would be proud. I am in awe of this. You HAVE to see the last TWO laps!

Lake Forest 5K

2008-07-16T07:58:00.000-07:00

I ran in the 14th Annual Lake Forest Fourth of July 5K this year. Even though it's only 3.1 miles there is something so fulfilling about running in an actual race, you know, as opposed to just doing 3+ miles on the streets around your house on any given day. I highly recommend registering for a race, paying the fee, putting on the bib, and getting in there with the pack! It's quite an experience!

This past 07-04-08 was actually the fifth 5K I've run in. Going in, even though I didn't tell anyone, I had it in my mind that I was going to run under 21 minutes. I was really counting on it. I've never ran that pace for three miles. That was my goal.

As I approached the the first mile marker I could hear the woman with the stopwatch yelling, "five fifty-five, five fifty-six, five fifty-seven . . . " and when I hit mile one it was exactly six minutes. I was thinking, "6.0 minutes, cool!" And, "If I keep up this pace I will have to call 9-1-1 at the finish!" Alas, I couldn't sustain it for three miles. I knew that too because I had done some speed work at a local track and I knew I couldn't sustain that pace. Why did I go out of the gate so fast? Well, it is the energy of the crowd. It seems no matter how much I tell myself, "I'm going out slower, an over eight minute pace for mile one, then I'll kick-it on the last two miles," I just can't seem to reign it in when it's an official race that I paid for.

Without making a choice to, I slowed down over the next two miles. One of the cool things about a race is the human interaction. See that younger guy in the foreground of the photo, the one with the iPod and number 407 on his bib? That's Matthew, age 13. Matthew and I were really pushing each other during the last mile. We kept passing each other and encouraging one another. He'd tell me I was doing well, I'd pass him and yell back, "Dig deep" or something like that. He'd pass me and say, "Don't give up" or something nice. At one point, he fell behind and was saying in my ear, "This is hell. I can't do it." I told him, "Push it, finish strong," and he would pass me again. In the end the thirteen year old crossed the finish line before me. I was giving it everything I had and he still beat me. But, not for him, my time wouldn't have been as fast. I love the camaraderie of running.

As much as I tried, when the official results came in, I didn't reach my race goal! My time ended up being 21:02.61, actually just about only three seconds over my goal! Darn. What was worse was at the race site they had my time just under my goal, but when it was adjusted and put on-line, I finished shy. What I really don't get about the results is it says I had a 6:48 pace, but wouldn't an "under seven minute mile pace" come out to less than 21 minutes? I'm so confused! Nevertheless, overall, 21:03 means I finished 66th out of 1,264 people. I was 5th in my age division. Not bad, right?

But, speaking of my age division, of course, I end up looking over the total results and I notice that this dude I know from my kids' swim team (who happens to be 39 years old like me) finished in 19:09! Amazing! Something to shoot for also. Just when I thought I was doing great too. It reminds me of the Ben Folds song, "There's always someone cooler than you!"

All-in-all, It really felt terrific to race and push myself. Even though I was unable to break 21 seconds, it was a PR for me and that's something to be proud of. I think I really like running. Or, maybe I hate it. No, I guess I love it.

Any Given Day

2008-07-14T10:35:00.000-07:00

Absentmindedly I wandered
Through an hour
Throughout the days
Over the years
Clueless to what was important
I obsessed over crumbs while
My children pined
For boardgames and family night
Forgetting my neighbor's occupation
I moved on to more important things
Software updates
A spotless car
Clearly, managing finances
Would take me far
I busily checked off my
Grocery list while sprinting
Past Jesus panhandling at the
Exit of the store
Then it hit me as the
Doctor yelled, "Clear!"
I realized my worst fear
Rearranging deck chairs on
On the Titanic
My life had been wasted

--Shenandoah Lynd

Peters Canyon Trail Race

2008-07-11T09:45:00.000-07:00

Yesterday evening I ran in my first trail race. It was part of the Vasque Peters Canyon Trail Run Series in Tustin. It was a 5-mile race put on by Renegade Racing. Not only had I never raced on dirt before, I had never run this course! Mentally it is always challenging to be unfamiliar with the course.

I felt like I got schooled in the ways of trail running. Almost immediately I found myself thinking, "Oh, no, there are hills!" I don't know what I was thinking, but I had not antisipated the steep inclines at all, "Duh!" Indeed, the first two miles were grueling. The first hills were like running up the down escalator! I was running about an 11-minute per mile pace for the first two miles and I found myself praying, "God, just let me not have to walk these hills." Had I been familiar with the course I would have at least known how many more of those pesky inclines I had to face. Plus, there was sand, and running downhill presentented its own challenges for my legs! It was actually quite funny, I had looked at the course map on-line, but it didn't dawn on me to interpret it as anything but flat, like running around the streets near my home. Like I said, I got an education!

You see, I had just run a 5K race on Independence Day. It was the Lake Forest 5K and I was pretty pleased with my results. I ran a 21:03 time which averaged to a 6:48 pace. Foolishly, not being a trail runner, I thought I would bust out with about the same pace for the five-miler on dirt. Like I said, hills!

Despite everything, my secondwind kicked in and I was really able to pick up my pace during the last part of the race. It felt good to pass a bunch of folks during those last two miles. My pace increased so much during the last half that I was able to run an overall 7-minute, 30-second pace. My results were as follows: 37:26 total time on a five-mile course, running a 7:30 pace, placing 51st out of 326 runners.

My sons were waiting for me at the finish line, cheering me on. Max surprised me by snapping a photo of my finish with his cell phone. It was a good evening.

All-in-all, it was an exhilarating experience. I actually totally loved it. What a rush!

U2's Overlooked Masterpiece

2008-07-05T10:18:00.001-07:00

There are some songs that we've heard so much we end up taking them for granted. I've been listening to U2s 1987 album, THE JOSHUA TREE, a lot lately and it's struck me just how genius, how beautiful, how meaningful their hit "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For" is. I honestly think it may be one of the best songs ever written. This group of lyrics in particular really have an emotional affect upon me:

"I believe in the Kingdom Come
Then all the colours will bleed into one, bleed into one
But yes, I'm still running
You broke the bonds
You loosed the chains
You carried the cross
And my shame
And my shame
You know I believed it
But I still haven't found
What I'm looking for . . . "

I can also totally relate to this line, so much so that it gives me chills:

"I have spoke with the tongue of angels
I have held the hand of the devil
It was warm in the night
I was cold as a stone
But I still haven't found
What I'm looking for . . . "

If it's been awhile since you've seen the clip of this hymn, then please give the video a look!

Whirlwind

2008-07-03T16:03:00.000-07:00

Surprised by your eyes
Impressed by your heart
Taken by your beauty
Right from the start
Holding you close
Pulling you near
Overcome by a grin
True love is near

--Shenandoah Lynd (08/08/92)

Saved

2008-07-03T16:01:00.000-07:00

He breathed into me
love so freely given
taken from my sorrow
spared from a fatal tomorrow
tears of joy
for a savior so giving
Lord, I rejoice
You have made my life worth living

--Shenandoah Lynd (08/08/92)

Never 'Till Now

2008-07-03T15:58:00.000-07:00

Never thought it would happen
Never thought it could be
Never thought even God could
Bring true love my way

Shows you what I know
Proves what God can do
Only the creator of this world
Could bring me someone sweet as you!

--Shenandoah Lynd (Aug. '92)

Faith

2008-07-03T15:55:00.000-07:00

No fear to be found
Step onto solid ground
Ask to His will
You won't be let down
Even loneliness will pass
You only need to ask

--Shenandoah Lynd (Aug. '92)

Salem

2008-07-02T14:01:00.000-07:00

With the three sisters in the background
You sent me into the field
Filling my bucket with blackberries
I'd skip home to you
The scent of zucchini bread guiding me
You'd make the jam
Spread on homemade biscuits
Tea and pickled cucumbers
The sweetness of life
Despite the sour
How I want to preserve
Boyhood recollections of you
I want to be a bluebird
On your windowsill in eternity
Willing it so, I am now
Running through the woods
Searching for signs of life
Lost in a memory graveyard
Tripping on vines
Ivy strangles your tombstone
Ravens suspended in air
Demanding payment
Reminding me: "Youth is gone.
Youth is gaaaaawn!"
It was all in my head
I'm left with a pillow
Slobber and sweat
Mason jars, empty as dreams

Better than Hannah Montana!

2008-06-26T20:05:00.000-07:00

I love this photo from Charlotte, North Carolina. Classic! Many fans hold up signs at Springsteen shows to request songs. This one was from a young girl. If you can't read the sign it says:

I LIKE YOU WAY BETTER THAN HANNAH MONTANA

When he read that sign Bruce said, "My aspirations have been realized. We can go home now!" On the back was her request, "Darlington County" and Bruce stuck it in as an audible. It's been over three months since I last saw Springsteen (March 16th in St. Paul, Minnesota, with Tony Cloyd) and I'm starting to get that twitchy feeling now.

Bruce Remembering Tim Russert

2008-06-26T20:02:00.000-07:00

This is a real nice tribute.

Baseball and Football

2008-06-22T23:32:00.001-07:00

Oh, the mind of George Carlin. What a loss! His comedy will live on forever though.

Ice Box Man

2008-06-22T23:21:00.000-07:00

This is merely one of my favorite Carlin routines. It's from the brilliant 1981 album, A PLACE FOR MY STUFF. Please do try to find the audio somewhere because his inflections and delivery are so amazing!

"Ice Box Man" by George Carlin

I'm the ice box man at our house. I'm Ice Box Man! I answer the call when there's a need at the ice box. Two very important responsibilities, the first one is: keeping people from standing with the door to the refrigerator open for more than 45 minutes at a time. God, that gets me mad - "YOU WANT TO CLOSE THAT GODDAMN DOOR PLEASE? YOU WANT TO CLOSE THE DOOR?! YOU'RE LETTING OUT ALL OF THE COLDNESS I SAVED OVERNIGHT! COME ON, CLOSE THE DOOR!" - you know, some guy smoked eight joints and he's gonna inventory my refrigerator. "Ummmm...Ummm...Uhhh.... "Here, here's fifty dollars- go down to the Burger King. Willya, God! We'll save more than that on electricity alone. Close the goddamn door, willya?"
Look, if you wanna know what's in there, why don't you take a Polaroid picture and go away and look at the picture and then come back and figure out what you want. Years ago, we didn't have Polaroid cameras. We had to make an OIL PAINTING of what was in there!

Aah, I don't let it get me down. 'Cause there's a bigger responsibility. And that is getting into that refrigerator and deciding which things need to be thrown away. Most people will not take that responsibility. Most people will just go and get what they want, leave everything else alone and say, "Well, someone else wants that. Someone else will eat that" Meanwhile, the thing is getting smaller and smaller and smaller and is, in fact stuck to the rack. Well, I've got to go in there and decide when to throw things away. "Chocolate pudding? Does anyone want this last chocolate pudding? I have just one chocolate pudding left. It's only pulled away from the side of the dish about three inches all the way around. And there's a huge fault running through the center of the pudding. Actually, it's nothing but a ball of skin at this point. Does anyone want a ball of fault ridden chocolate pudding skin? I'm only going to throw it away."

Do people do that with you? Offer you some food that if you don't eat it, they're only going to throw it away. Well, doesn't that make you feel dandy? "Here's something to eat, Dave. Hurry up, it's spoiling!" "Something for you, Angela. Eat quickly, that green part is moving!" "Here, Bob. Eat this before I give it to an animal." Y'ever been looking through the refrigerator and you come across an empty plate? Boy, that starts me to wondering. Did something eat something else? Maybe the olives ate the tuna! Maybe that chicken isn't really dead yet. Actually, I picture a little mouse with gloves and a parka on, y'know. Just waiting for the lights to go out.

Perhaps the worst thing that can happen is to reach into the refrigerator and come out with something that you cannot identify at all. You literally do not know what it is. Could be meat, could be cake. Usually, at a time like that, I'll bluff. "Honey, is this good?" "Well, what is it?" "I don't know. I've never seen anything like it. It looks like...meatcake!" "Well, smell it." (snort, sniff) "It has absolutely no smell whatsoever!" "It's good! Put it back! Somebody is saving it. It'll turn up in something." Thats what frightens me. That someone will consider it a challenge and use it just because it's in there.

It's a leftover. What a sad word that is. Leftover. How would you like to be...a leftover? Well, it wouldn't be bad if they were taking people out to be shot. I might even volunteer. But, y'know, leftovers make you feel good twice. D'ja ever think about that? When you first put them away, you feel really intelligent- "I'm saving food!" And then, after a month, when hair is growing out of them and you throw them away you feel...really intelligent- "I'm saving my life!"

When you make a sandwich at home, do you reach down past the first three or four pieces of bread to go down and get 'the good bread'? It's kind of a self preservation thing, y'know? What you're really saying is, "Let my family eat the rotten bread! I'll take care of Numero Uno!" And down you go into the loaf. Down, looking for the two that you want, a matching pair. And you have to be careful pulling them out so they don't tear. And then when you get them to the top, the upper eight slices fall the other way. I never straighten them out. I think, screw it, let 'em think a burglar made a sandwich. Not my job, straightening out the bread.

Gotta tell me. In the refrigerator, who is it, please that puts into the refrigerator the half-gallon containers of milk with only that much left in them? I get one of those every time. Hey, here's some milk- fooom! ...God, not enough to drink. Better put that back, huh? I know my responsibilities.

Five Sentence Tribute: George Carlin

2008-06-22T23:10:00.000-07:00

I know, this should be a seven word tribute to the man, but I can't post things I wouldn't want my children to read! I was lucky enough to have seen Mr. Carlin live more than once and to have met him twice. He has hundreds, count them, hundreds of genius comedy routines. One of my favorites was the "Ice Box Man" which I think I may just put in a separate post. This man was my absolute, all-time, second-place-is-not-even-close, favorite comedian, and man, this one really hurts.

Maybe I'm Just Highly Evolved?

2008-06-20T09:03:00.000-07:00

This one was just released on "Yahoo! News" today. This may explain a lot in my life . . .

SARCASM SEEN AS EVOLUTIONARY SURVIVAL SKILL

by Meredith F. Small, LiveScience's Human Nature Columnist, from LiveScience.com

Humans are fundamentally social animals. Our social nature means that we interact with each other in positive, friendly ways, and it also means we know how to manipulate others in a very negative way.

Neurophysiologist Katherine Rankin at the University of California, San Francisco, has also recently discovered that sarcasm, which is both positively funny and negatively nasty, plays an important part in human social interaction.

So what?

I mean really, who cares? Oh for God's sake. Don't you have anything better to do that read this column?

According to Dr. Rankin, if you didn't get the sarcastic tone of the previous sentences you must have some damage to your parahippocampal gyrus which is located in the right brain. People with dementia, or head injuries in that area, often lose the ability to pick up on sarcasm, and so they don't respond in a socially appropriate ways.

Presumably, this is a pathology, which in turn suggests that sarcasm is part of human nature and probably an evolutionarily good thing.

How might something so, well, sarcastic as sarcasm, be part of the human social toolbox?

Evolutionary biologists claim that sociality is what has made humans such a successful species. We are masters at what anthropologists and others call "social intelligence." We recognize and keep track of hundreds of relationships, and we easily distinguish between enemies and friends.

More important, we run our lives by social calculation. A favor is mentally recorded and paid back, sometimes many years later. Likewise, insults are marked down on the mental score card in indelible ink. And we are constantly bickering and making up, even with people we love.

Sarcasm, then, is a verbal hammer that connects people in both a negative and positive way. We know that sense of humor is important to relationships; if someone doesn't get your jokes, they aren't likely to be your friend (or at least that's my bottom line about friendship). Sarcasm is simply humor's dark side, and it would be just as disconcerting if a friend didn't get your snide remarks.

It's also easy to imagine how sarcasm might be selected over time as evolutionarily crucial. Imagine two ancient humans running across the savannah with a hungry lion in pursuit. One guy says to the other, "Are we having fun yet?" and the other just looks blank and stops to figure out what in the world his pal meant by that remark. End of friendship, end of one guy's contribution to the future of the human gene pool.

Fast forward a few million years and the network of human relationships is wider and more complex, and just as important to survival. The corporate chairman throws out a sarcastic remark and those who "get" it laugh, smile, and gain favor. In the same way, if the chair never makes a remark, sarcastic people are making them behind his or her back, forming a clique by their mutually negative, but funny, comments. Either way, sarcasm plays a role in making and breaking alliances and friendship.

Thanks goodness, because life without out sarcasm would be a dull and way too nice place to be, if you ask me.

Why I Teach

2008-06-16T11:31:00.000-07:00

Part of me feels weird for doing this post. You know, it's not considered socially acceptable to "toot your own horn" and all, but if you know me well, you know I'm not above doing so! I became a teacher eight years ago and there's a reason I wanted to be a teacher. This post tells you why. I reason is I wanted to make a difference. Sometimes I wonder if I am and then, something like this happens to let me know that I am. That feels good. Honestly, I love my job.

Today at recess I saw a strange envelope in my mailbox at work. It was from a person I didn't know at the district office. Inside there was this note: "Mr. Lynd, Thought you would enjoy reading this essay from one of your former students." Attached was this wonderful essay from a student I had in third grade three years ago.

I remember Karina well. I remember everything she wrote about. I also adore the fact that she ends with a poltical statement too! What a crack-up! Turns out this is what she submitted for her sixth grade writing proficiency examination. The writing task was to write an expository essay about someone you know that deserves an award. In the grand fashion of George Bailey, Karina's composition makes me a very rich man. Here is what Karina wrote:

Someone I Know Deserves an Award

Do you know anyone that deserves an award? I do and if there ever was a competition for being "The Greatest Teacher" I would choose Mr. Lynd as a nominee. Mr. Lynd was my third grade teacher and he worked in the school, Remington. I had attended Remington the year before and that same year I had arrived to the U.S.A. from Mexico. While I was in second grade I didn't know any English, but when I moved to third grade in Mr. Lynd's class I learned English before the middle of the year! Every day Mr. Lynd would encouragae me to read in both English and Spanish. We would have to write a journal every day, but instead of me writing my journal, he would call me up to his desk, along with other kids that weren't very good talking or writing in English. He would sit with us and make us read little books that didn't have many sophisticated words in them. Then, after we would all finish the book, he would talk to us about what words we couldn't pronounce or read. One day I had a question about the word colonel and he told me that English was a very crazy language and that he would be glad to help me. That day I learned that the word colonel was pronounced like if it had an R, even if we couldn't see it, we had to say it. This was very difficult for me. Mr. Lynd even established a club that would help us with reading and writing. Mr. Lynd didn't just help us with learning, but he also helped us emotionally.

One day I got mad at this girl named Diana because of what she said about me and when Mr. Lynd found out he didn't get mad at us. He just made us stay after school and we had to solve our problem before we left. One Sunday afternoon my dad was driving and a car crashed our car from the back. I was very frightened because it was my first car crash and I started to cry. On Monday when I went to school, Mr. Lynd told me to tell him if I was okay and I told him about the car crash. He told me that he was also very frightened when he was in a car crash, but he told me he knew the perfect cure. He told me to write a story or book about what had happened and told me also to draw a picture of what I had seen. He said that it's always good to tell someone how you feel and I had done the right thing by telling him. Mr. Lynd was and is a very good teacher.

Some kids sometimes didn't like him because they said he was mean, but they didn't even have him. At first when I heard about Mr. Lynd being one of the meanest teachers at Remington I was terrified, but when I met him I noticed it was all lies and he was actually one of the nicest teachers. Mr. Lynd was a very cool teacher and he encouraged us with "Lynd Dollars!" Every time we got a good grade, Mr. Lynd would give us a "Lynd Dollar." These Lynd dollars became a source of encouragement for getting good grades. We could use the dollars to buy stuff like pencils, little toys, or 15 minutes of free time. Mr. Lynd told me one day that I was now officially an English speaker, which just meant that I had learned English in less than a school year. I was very happy and I got home and told my mom. The next day I told Mr. Lynd that it was all thanks to him that I could talk in English. He told me he was very happy that I didn't give up. If it wasn't for him maybe right now I wouldn't be talking in English or even writing this. I soon became one of his best students, or at least that's what he told me! I remember that my parents always say that Mr. Lynd was my best teacher ever! I am very thankful that he never lost hope for kids like me and little by little his club started disappearing because every kid would have succeded in English. He said he was very happy for all of us and he told us that every single step we take in our lifetime one day we would look back at it, which meant that every single choice we make, even the ones we think don't matter, will affect every minute in our future. I think Mr. Lynd would be the perfect nominee for "The Greatest Teacher" award! I especially remember these words that he told me the last day of school, If you keep believing in yourself you can accomplish many wonderful things in your lifetime, maybe even become the first woman president! That's why I hope Obama wins!

Good News on Father's Day!

2008-06-15T08:34:00.001-07:00

So it's Father's Day. Wes woke me up telling me that he made me breakfast. He did. It was thoughtful and yummy. Zoey and Kasey honored me with the love of a six and four year old as they brought me their school crafts that might as well have been Springsteen tickets. Chrisy got me pounds and pounds of my favorite Peet's Coffee. Max wrote these words to me: "Dad, I love you soooo much. I am so thankful for the things you do for me like make me eggs and clean the house. And most of all I love it when you watch movies with me and teach me about music." I think that last line meant so much to me because to me it meant, "I like YOU just the way you are, I like your interests, and I like to spend time with you." Good stuff, huh? But, it's hardly the best news of the day.

This morning in my junior high group at church I focused on the idea of "the Good News" and I essentially asked the kids if they truly believed that God loved them fully right now. I drew heavily on one of the greatest books I've ever read. It is called THE RAGAMUFFIN GOSPEL. It's by Brennan Manning. I really started thinking about this book again this morning. Something deep within my heart welled up saying, "Doah, my grace is the best gift you will ever receive. Doah, my grace is the best gift you could give to your children. What's more, you've got to tell this Good News to the junior highers!"

The best gift I ever received is recorded in Romans 1:17 and it says this:

The Good News tells us how God makes us right in his sight. This is accomplished from start to finish by faith. As the Scriptures says, "It is through faith that a righteous person has life."

Here's a passage about this from Manning's book. This comes from "Something Is Radically Wrong" which is the first chapter:

I believe the Reformation actually began the day Martin Luther was praying over the meaning of Paul's assertion that the gospel reveals the righteousness of God to us--it shows how faith leads to faith. In other words, the righteous shall find life through faith (see Romans 1:17). Like many Christians today, Luther wrestled through the night with this core question: How could the gospel of Christ be truly called "good news" if God is a righteous judge who rewards the good and punishes the evil? Did Jesus really have to come to reveal that terrifying message? How could the revelation of God in Christ Jesus be accurately called "news" since the Old Testament carried the same theme, or for that matter "good" with the threat of punishment hanging like a dark cloud over the valley of history?

"Justification by grace through faith" is the theologian's learned phrase for what Chesterton once called "the furious love of God." He is not moody or capricious; He knows no seasons of change. He has a single relentless stance toward us: He loves us. He is the only God man has ever heard of who loves sinners. False gods--the gods of human manufacturing--despise sinners, but the Father of Jesus loves all, no matter what they do. But of course, this is almost too incredible for us to accept. Nevertheless, the central affirmation of the Reformation stands: Through no merit of ours, but by His mercy, we have been restored to a right relationship with God through life, death, and resurrection of His beloved Son. This is the Good News, the gospel of grace.

My favorite passage may be this:

Here is the revelation bright as the evening star: Jesus comes for sinners, for those as outcast as tax collectors and for those caught up in the squalid choices and failed dreams. He comes for corporate executives, street people, superstars, farmers, hookers, addicts, IRS agents, AIDS victims, and even used-car salesmen. Jesus not only talks with these people but dines with them--fully aware that His table fellowship with sinners will raise the eyebrows of religious bureaucrats who hold up the robes and insignia of their authority to justify their condemnation of the truth and their rejection of the gospel of grace.

In that section Manning is talking about Matthew 9:9-13. You really have to read Matthew 9:9-13 here:

Matthew 9:9-13 (THE MESSAGE)

Passing along, Jesus saw a man at his work collecting taxes. His name was Matthew. Jesus said, "Come along with me." Matthew stood up and followed him. Later when Jesus was eating supper at Matthew's house with his close followers, a lot of disreputable characters came and joined them. When the Pharisees saw him keeping this kind of company, they had a fit, and lit into Jesus' followers. "What kind of example is this from your Teacher, acting cozy with crooks and riff-raff?" Jesus overhearing shot back, "Who needs a doctor: the healthy or the sick? Go figure out what this Scripture means: 'I'm after mercy, not religion.' I'm here to invite outsiders, not coddle insiders."

Here is what Brennan Manning then says about that chunk of the Bible:

This passage should be read, reread, and memorized. Every Christian generation tries to dim the blinding brightness of its meaning because the gospel seems too good to be true. We think salvation belongs to the proper and pious, to those who stand at a safe distance from the back alleys of existence, clucking their judgments at those who have been soiled by life. In the name of Grace, what has been the verdict of the Christian community on the stained life of Rock Hudson? To the disclosure that he called a priest to his deathbed, confessed his sins, and cried out God for forgiveness?

I think we all need to reread this line: Every Christian generation tries to dim the blinding brightness of its meaning because the gospel seems too good to be true.

I want to draw on Luke 23:39-43. In this section of the Bible Jesus is on the cross and there are two criminals hanging beside him. One of the criminals mocks Jesus, but the other criminal protested and then he said, "Jesus, remember me when you come into your Kingdom." Jesus replied, "I assure you, today you will be with me in paradise."

So what did that criminal do to get salvation? It goes back to Romans 1:17. He just had faith. He believed. This is what I so badly wanted the junior highers to get today: We don't have to do something or not do something to clean ourselves up and make ourselves presentable to God. We are presentable now! He loves us now!

It also goes back to the passage I shared in Matthew 9. Jesus has a place at the table for crooks and riff-raff. And, since I was among the riff-raff, that is indeed Good News! Again, Manning puts it this way:

Through no merit of ours, but by His mercy, we have been restored to a right relationship with God through the life, death, and resurrection of His beloved Son. This is the Good News, the gospel of grace.

Do you get that? I can't do anything to earn God's approval!

So, this is where I am at today. I do not want to pollute the message found in the gospel of grace. I do not want to dilute the Good News.

Five "Sentence" Tribute: Tim Russert

2008-06-13T13:00:00.000-07:00

Wow. Shocking news. 58 years old. MEET THE PRESS was a great show. I really liked Tim Russert.

Running

2008-06-12T13:27:00.000-07:00

"You don't run to generate self-esteem,
but to render it beside the point.
This any religious man will tell you."
--Benjamin Cheever

RUNNING

While running
I saw majestic trees
Delicate yellow buds
A proud new mom
Grey-haired lovers in the park
Sun rays dancing on peeling bark

Running further
Looking closer
I saw how far I'd come
The strength of my sons
Every best friend I've had
My old man wasn't so bad

Running farther on
Looking closer still
My heart expanded
All my needs were met
I saw God's jubilee
The beauty inside me

--Shenandoah Lynd

Saunter

2008-06-12T11:12:00.000-07:00

Walking with my daughter
I finally understood
My Lord when he said,
"For the Kingdom of God
belongs to such as these."

Armed with just a stick
She took on the world
No calculating
Without hesitation
She pursued her goals

Why can't I be more
Like my three-year-old?
Collecting leaves makes her happy
Joy contained in a pine cone
Me, I need an iPhone

"Wait daddy!" is wisdom
I need to be content to
Let a day unfold
Busyness is my fool's gold
That's what my toddler teacher told

--Shenandoah Lynd

Good Ol' Days

2008-06-11T11:47:00.000-07:00

It was fun while it lasted
My life apart from you
I enjoyed those nights getting blasted
Throwing back the brew

The illusion of freedom was grand
Keeping you up on the shelf
Living with my head in the sand
Daily serving just myself

Pops taught me all about sex
Fun without a price
No matter whose life it wrecks
Deception's a skill, not a vice

Am I a product of those days?
Or a whole new creation?
Heavily, the guilt it weighs
To my disgrace, I forget I'm your formation

--Shenandoah Lynd

Sabbath

2008-05-30T09:12:00.000-07:00

Sabbath called my name

I will never be the same

"Remember me," my Lord pleaded

There was a time when I was all you needed

"Stop doing," He said

So my agenda I shed

"Inaction today will fill your tank"

So I went to his well and drank

The living water was cold

Grace something to behold

Abba drew my head to His chest

And gave me rest

--Shenandoah Lynd

Five Sentence Tribute: Sydney Pollack

2008-05-27T08:10:00.000-07:00

My four favorite Sydney Pollack films came out in the decade between my 12th and 22nd birthdays: ABSENCE OF MALICE, TOOTSIE, OUT OF AFRICA, and HAVANA. Sure there are other great ones, but you'd do well renting those four. Coincidentally, Chrisy and I recently rented TOOTSIE for Max because we both hold it so dear. Pollack was a good director and he could act. I thought he was great in MICHAEL CLAYTON, THE PLAYER, EYES WIDE SHUT, and again, TOOTSIE.

Desire

2008-05-21T13:31:00.000-07:00

"She's the candle burning in my room

I'm like the needle - needle and spoon

Over the counter with a shotgun

Pretty soon, everybody got one

And the fever when I'm beside her

Desire, desire . . . ."

--U2's "Desire"

"Coffee is strong at the Cafe Du Monde

Donuts are too hot to touch

Just like a fool, when those sweet goodies cool

I eat til I eat way too much

'cause Im livin on things that excite me

Be they pastry or lobster or love . . . ."

--Jimmy Buffett's "The Wino & I Know"

Awhile back my men's group went through the above-pictured book, "The Journey of Desire: Searching for the Life We Only Dreamed of" by John Eldredge. I didn't really like the book so I'm not saying you should read it. I did finish it, but I didn't love it. If you want a good book recommendation, please read my post from last week, Buy This Book.

Even though I'm not recommending Eldredge's book, it did get me thinking about desire, and I would like you to read this post.

What is desire? My dictionary says it's "a feeling that one would get pleasure or satisfaction by obtaining or possessing something."

If you read those song lyrics at the beginning of this post then you'll see that I am not alone in my belief that the objects of our desire aren't always things that are good for us. In the first song Bono alludes to the desire of a drug addict, melting drugs in a spoon over a candle in room somewhere, getting ready to deliver his desire into his arm via the needle. He also points out that some people desire something so much that they just grab a shotgun and go steal it. Then there's the Buffett lyrics. He's singing about things that anybody could fall victim to, like eating too many doughnuts. Eldredge never mentions these songs, it's just that I kept thinking about them during the entire first half of the book.

That's the biggest problem I had with "The Journey of Desire" book: Eldredge doesn't really tell his main point until very far into the book. In the first part of the book he pretty much says that desire is necessary for a meaningful life and then he points out that most Christians have decided not to reach for their desires because it opens us up to the pain of not obtaining them. There is lot I agree with. For example in chapter three he points out how our churches have actually (hopefully inadvertently) killed our desires and replaced desire with their more important goals of knowledge and performance. He writes:

"Jesus appeals to our desire because he came to speak to it. When we abandon desire, we no longer hear or understand what he is saying. But we have returned to the message of the synagogue; we are preaching the law. And desire is the enemy. After all, desire is the single major hindrance to the goal--getting us in line. We are told to kill desire and call it sanctification."

Oh, yes, sadly, I agree with this. Christianity is not about getting us in line, getting us to follow rules. It is not about knowledge or performance. Rather, it is about living life to its fullest. Yes, this important point is where I agree with Eldredge: We should never abandon desire to duty. One of his great lines is "Being offered tips and techniques for living a more dutiful life isn't even in the field of good news. We know in our hearts our dilemma cannot be: '"I sure wish I could be a more decent chap. What I really need is a program to improve my morals.' Now, Jesus seemed to think that what he was offering really and truly spoke to our dilemma."

However, I was so frustrated during the much of the book because, although Eldredge asserts that our dilemma is desire, he never defines desire. For too long he doesn't answer the troubling questions I had in my mind while reading: What kind of desire? What is the difference between godly desire and worldly desire? What if it's some married dude's desire to have an affair? What if I truly just desire to eat an entire pecan pie or whole carrot cake, surely that can't be good for me? So I kept singing the songs, "Just like a fool, when those sweet goodies cool, I eat till I eat way too much . . . . burnin' burnin' de-si-i-i-i-ire!"

So for almost the entire book I would find myself both agreeing and disagreeing with Eldredge. He writes some other things that I totally agree with such as: "This is the great lost truth of the Christian faith, that correction of Judaism made by Jesus and passed on to us: the goal of morality is not morality--it is ecstasy. You are intended for pleasure!" Then I would find myself saying, "This is far too easy."

In the end Eldredge does get to his point. He begins to get there in chapter 6. Then, thankfully comes chapter 7, "The Great Restoration" a chapter I would highly recommend. Here Eldredge links hope and desire. He states that you can only hope for what you truly desire and he begins to make it clear that when he was writing of "desire" for the previous 100 pages, he was using the term as a synonym for "godly desire." That he still doesn't appear to understand that many humans have evil desires that will derail their lives may be the fatal flaw of this book. Nevertheless, he is on to something when he starts telling the reader to desire God's promises.

In linking hope to desire Eldredge quotes 1 Peter 1:13: "Set your hope fully on the grace to be given you when Jesus Christ is revealed." And in the end of chapter 6 he finally spells it out: "Desire cannot live without hope. Yet we can only hope for what we desire." So our desires are that what we truly hope for. Then, in chapter 7, he gives this great illustration:

"We have made a nothing of eternity. If I told you that your income would triple next year, and that European vacation you've wanted is jut around the corner, you'd be excited, hopeful. The future would look promising. It seems possible, desirable. But our ideas of heaven, while possible, aren't all that desirable. Whatever it is we think is coming in the next season of our existence, we don't don't think it is worth getting all that excited about. We make nothing of eternity by enlarging the significance of this life and by diminishing the reality of what the next life is all about. Nearly every Christian I have spoken with has some idea that eternity is an unending church service."

How sad that I would desire a European vacation, but not desire what is promised to me in the Bible. Yet, I can relate.

The ultimate point is that my deepest desire should be firmly placed upon the hope of God restoring everything. My desire should be for heaven which is NOT an unending church service. The author leans heavily on Isaiah 65:17 and Revelation 21:1 and the fact that God will give us a new Earth. The coming kingdom of God is where we must place our desire. Eldredge writes: "We do not know exactly how God will do it, but we do know this: the kingdom of God brings restoration. The only things destroyed are the things outside God's realm--sin, disease, death. But we who are God's children, the heavens and the earth he has made, will go on."

In the end Eldredge ties it all back to a battle for our hearts. On any given day, at any given moment really it boils down to this question: "Where is my heart?" Life is pointless without desires and my deepest desire must be for God. Deep in my heart of hearts, have I diminished the things of this world while elevating the things of heaven? Is my heart longing for God and his promises? Eldredge calls this desire for God the Sacred Romance. It's a romance between me and God. My true hope for a truly full life lies in this Sacred Romance and the promise of His coming kingdom.

What is this romance? The way I see it is there are these get moments in life, moments of total ecstasy. These are glimpses of our true creation. They are glimpses of Eden. Glimpses of the coming kingdom. There I will have an exotic intimacy with God. Although I feel like I have had a few spirit filled experiences like this, moments when everything feels just perfect, this is not something we can really ever grasp here in this life.

In the final chapter Eldredge really brings it home for me with the analogy of a kiss. He asks, "What is the truth of a kiss?" After all, "a kiss is two sets of mandibles pressing together for a certain duration of time." Boring! If you'd never had a real kiss, one that stirs your soul, would you want one based solely on those boring facts? Of course not. But, that is what church and religion has done to us in regard to God. We talk about "theology" and then reduce God, Jesus, the gospel, and heaven to boring facts. As the author says, it's all quite dead: "It's not that these insights aren't true; it's that they no longer speak."

When Eldredge writes of the Sacred Romance it excites me. Here he speaks my language when he says: "In fact, every story or movie or song or poem that has ever stirred your soul is telling you something you need to know about the Sacred Romance. Even nature is crying out to us of God's great heart and the drama that is unfolding. Sunrise and sunset tell the tale every day, remembering Eden's glory, prophesying Eden's return."

In his chapter "The Grand Affair" Eldredge brings sex into the sacramental realm when he writes, "For us creatures of the flesh, sexual intimacy is the closest parallel we have to real worship. Even the world knows this. Why else would sexual ecstasy become the number one rival to communion with God?"

Speak of kisses, poems, songs, movies, sunrises, and sunsets in terms of what awaits me upon Christ's return, speak of romance in relation to what awaits me after this life, talk about sex as worship and I truly begin to desire heaven.

We so badly want connection. Eldredge writes about an evening when he had his wife and best friends all share a piece of art that they loved, a song, or a poem, or perhaps a film clip, then he writes: "Art is a glimpse into our hearts, and you can learn so much about someone when he shares with you something that has stirred his soul." That is why I love art, it stirs the soul, it is a glimpse of Eden.

In a nutshell the Grand Affair is this good news: God has ultimately healed our curse of isolation!

So you see we have all these glimpses of Eden here on earth, but none of them can compare to the Sacred Romance/the Grand Affair with God and nothing can be more desirable than the hope of eternity that God has promised us with him. Therefore, I must not put my hope in anything that is in this life. I must reduce the noise and distractions of in this life and align my heart with God and hope only in the life that is coming after this one.

The author puts it this way in the last chapter:

"It is coming . . . . The life I prize is coming. The very thing that I am aching for now, missing now, seeking now in other things is exactly what's coming to me . . . As you raise your glass of wine, toast to the banquet to come; as you see anything beautiful you'd like to have, say to yourself, In a little while it shall be mine forever; as you make love, remember it is rehearsal for the Grand Affair."

In short, I am not in control. I cannot create my own little Eden here on earth, I cannot do it with people, things, stuff, I just cannot do it, period. BUT, God will. He has promised me something better than triple my income or a European vacation. Moreover, he makes good on his promises!

God will restore everything. That my friends is something to hope for. That my friends is the only thing worth desiring.

But, really, what about me? What do I truly desire? Time for honesty. The answer is "It depends."

On a bad day I desire a cigar, to be left alone, a new episode of LOST, or half a package of Nutter Butters. On an okay day I desire to meet my wife's needs, the best for my kids, or to run three miles. On a good day I desire to love everybody around me well, for mine and my friends' marriages to be thriving, for God to bless my church, and for the junior high ministry to be fantastic. But, on a great day, on a really great day, my only desire is to live like the promise of God's coming kingdom is enough. And, you know what? There are more and more great days!

Now as I'm thinking of desire I am singing a different U2 song. I'm singing lyrics from "Walk On" as follows:

"You're packing a suitcase for a place

none of us has been

A place that has to be believed

to be seen."

Bush's Israeli Knesset Speech

2008-05-16T15:04:00.000-07:00

It's been pretty difficult to avoid the news and soundbites about President George W. Bush's speech before the Israeli Knesset on Thursday, May 15. Below I have bolded the one paragraph (the 20th paragraph of the speech) that Senator Obama personalized and took offense to. Incidently, the paragraph that immediately follows that one is probably my favorite paragraph of the speech (the one that says "307 million strong").

Some have said the president was out of line to criticize another American while on foreign soil. I don't think so. This speech was brilliant.

I heard several clips on the radio and it was a very powerful speech. It was well received by the Israeli Parliament (witness the very long periods of applause. The speech moved me. I honestly think this is the best speech President Bush has given during his eight years in office. Furthermore, I agree with the sentiment of this speech and it actually makes me proud to be an American.

I know it is long, but I am posting the text of the speech here:

Prepared Text of Bush's Knesset Speech
May 15, 2008 4:04 a.m.
As Prepared for Delivery:
Remarks by the President to Members of the Knesset
The White House Office of the Press Secretary
(Jerusalem)

Shalom. Laura and I are thrilled to be back in Israel. We have been deeply moved by the celebrations of the past two days. And this afternoon, I am honored to stand before one of the world's great democratic assemblies and convey the wishes of the American people.

It is a rare privilege for an American President to address the Knesset. Although the Prime Minister told me there is something even rarer – to have just one person in this chamber speaking at a time. My only regret is that one of Israel's greatest leaders is not here to share the moment. He is a warrior for the ages, a man of peace, and a dear friend. The prayers of all Americans are with Ariel Sharon.

We gather to mark a momentous occasion. Sixty years ago in Tel Aviv, David Ben-Gurion proclaimed Israel's independence, founded on the "natural right of the Jewish people to be masters of their own fate." What followed was more than the establishment of a new country. It was the redemption of an ancient promise given to Abraham, Moses, and David – a homeland for the chosen people in Eretz Yisrael.

Eleven minutes later, on the orders of President Harry Truman, the United States was proud to be the first nation to recognize Israel's independence. And on this landmark anniversary, America is proud to be Israel's closest ally and best friend in the world.

The alliance between our governments is unbreakable, yet the source of our friendship runs deeper than any treaty. It is grounded in the shared spirit of our people, the bonds of the Book, the ties of the soul. When William Bradford stepped off the Mayflower in 1620, he quoted the words of Jeremiah: "Come let us declare in Zion the word of God." The founders of my country saw a new promised land and bestowed upon their towns names like Bethlehem and New Canaan. And in time, many Americans became passionate advocates for a Jewish state.

Centuries of suffering and sacrifice would pass before this dream was fulfilled. The Jewish people endured the agony of the pogroms, the tragedy of the Great War, and the horror of the Holocaust – what Elie Wiesel called "the kingdom of the night." Soulless men took away lives and broke apart families. Yet they could not take away the spirit of the Jewish people, and they could not break the promise of God. When news of Israel's freedom finally arrived, Golda Meir, a fearless woman raised in Wisconsin, could summon only tears. She later said: "For two thousand years we have waited for our deliverance. Now that it is here it is so great and wonderful that it surpasses human words."

The joy of independence was tempered by the outbreak of battle, a struggle that has continued for six decades. Yet in spite of the violence, in defiance of the threats, Israel has built a thriving democracy in the heart of the Holy Land. You have welcomed immigrants from the four corners of the Earth. You have forged a free and modern society based on a love of liberty, a passion for justice, and a respect for human dignity. You have worked tirelessly for peace. And you have fought valiantly for freedom.

My country's admiration for Israel does not end there. When Americans look at Israel, we see a pioneer spirit that worked an agricultural miracle and now leads a high-tech revolution. We see world-class universities and a global leader in business, innovation, and the arts. And we see a resource more valuable than oil or gold – the talent and determination of a free people who refuse to let any obstacle stand in the way of their destiny.

I have been fortunate to see the character of Israel up close. I have touched the Western Wall, seen the sun reflected in the Sea of Galilee, and prayed at Yad Vashem. Earlier today, I visited Masada, an inspiring monument to courage and sacrifice. At this historic site, Israeli soldiers swear an oath: "Masada shall never fall again." Citizens of Israel: Masada shall never fall again, and America will always stand with you.

This anniversary is a time to reflect on the past. It is also an opportunity to look to the future. As we go forward, our alliance will be guided by clear principles – shared convictions rooted in moral clarity and unswayed by popularity polls or the shifting opinion of international elites.

We believe in the matchless value of every man, woman, and child. So we insist that the people of Israel have the right to a decent, normal, and peaceful life, just like the citizens of every other nation.

We believe that democracy is the only way to ensure human rights. So we consider it a source of shame that the United Nations routinely passes more human rights resolutions against the freest democracy in the Middle East than any other nation in the world.

We believe that religious liberty is fundamental to civilized society. So we condemn anti-Semitism in all forms – whether by those who openly question Israel's right to exist, or by others who quietly excuse them.

We believe that free people should strive and sacrifice for peace. So we applaud the courageous choices Israel's leaders have made. We also believe that nations have a right to defend themselves and that no nation should ever be forced to negotiate with killers pledged to its destruction.

We believe that targeting innocent lives to achieve political objectives is always and everywhere wrong. So we stand together against terror and extremism, and we will never let down our guard or lose our resolve.

The fight against terror and extremism is the defining challenge of our time. It is more than a clash of arms. It is a clash of visions, a great ideological struggle. On one side are those who defend the ideals of justice and dignity with the power of reason and truth. On the other side are those who pursue a narrow vision of cruelty and control by committing murder, inciting fear, and spreading lies.

This struggle is waged with the technology of the 21st century, but at its core it is the ancient battle between good and evil. The killers claim the mantle of Islam, but they are not religious men. No one who prays to the God of Abraham could strap a suicide vest to an innocent child, or blow up guiltless guests at a Passover Seder, or fly planes into office buildings filled with unsuspecting workers. In truth, the men who carry out these savage acts serve no higher goal than their own desire for power. They accept no God before themselves. And they reserve a special hatred for the most ardent defenders of liberty, including Americans and Israelis.

That is why the founding charter of Hamas calls for the "elimination" of Israel. That is why the followers of Hezbollah chant "Death to Israel, Death to America!" That is why Osama bin Laden teaches that "the killing of Jews and Americans is one of the biggest duties." And that is why the president of Iran dreams of returning the Middle East to the Middle Ages and calls for Israel to be wiped off the map.

There are good and decent people who cannot fathom the darkness in these men and try to explain their words away. This is natural. But it is deadly wrong. As witnesses to evil in the past, we carry a solemn responsibility to take these words seriously. Jews and Americans have seen the consequences of disregarding the words of leaders who espouse hatred. And that is a mistake the world must not repeat in the 21st century.

Some seem to believe we should negotiate with terrorists and radicals, as if some ingenious argument will persuade them they have been wrong all along. We have heard this foolish delusion before. As Nazi tanks crossed into Poland in 1939, an American senator declared: "Lord, if only I could have talked to Hitler, all of this might have been avoided." We have an obligation to call this what it is – the false comfort of appeasement, which has been repeatedly discredited by history.

Some people suggest that if the United States would just break ties with Israel, all our problems in the Middle East would go away. This is a tired argument that buys into the propaganda of our enemies, and America rejects it utterly. Israel's population may be just over 7 million. But when you confront terror and evil, you are 307 million strong, because America stands with you.

America stands with you in breaking up terrorist networks and denying the extremists sanctuary. And America stands with you in firmly opposing Iran's nuclear weapons ambitions. Permitting the world's leading sponsor of terror to possess the world's deadliest weapon would be an unforgivable betrayal of future generations. For the sake of peace, the world must not allow Iran to have a nuclear weapon.

Ultimately, to prevail in this struggle, we must offer an alternative to the ideology of the extremists by extending our vision of justice and tolerance, freedom and hope. These values are the self-evident right of all people, of all religions, in all of the world because they are a gift from Almighty God. Securing these rights is also the surest way to secure peace. Leaders who are accountable to their people will not pursue endless confrontation and bloodshed. Young people with a place in their society and a voice in their future are less likely to search for meaning in radicalism. And societies where citizens can express their conscience and worship their God will not export violence, they will be partners for peace.

This fundamental insight, that freedom yields peace, is the great lesson of the 20th century. Now our task is to apply it in the 21st. Nowhere is this work more urgent than here in the Middle East. We must stand with the reformers working to break the old patterns of tyranny and despair. We must give voice to the millions of ordinary people who dream of a better life in freedom. We must confront the moral relativism that views all forms of government as equally acceptable and thereby consigns whole societies to slavery. Above all, we must have faith in our values and ourselves and confidently pursue the expansion of liberty as the path to a peaceful future.

That future will be a dramatic departure from the Middle East of today. So as we mark 60 years from Israel's founding, let us envision the region 60 years from now. This vision will not arrive easily or overnight, and it will encounter violent resistance from our enemies. But if we and future Presidents and Knessets maintain our resolve and have faith in our ideals, here is the Middle East we can see:

Israel will be celebrating its 120th anniversary as one of the world's great democracies, a secure and flourishing homeland for the Jewish people. The Palestinian people will have the homeland they have long dreamed of and deserved – a democratic state that is governed by law, respects human rights, and rejects terror. From Cairo and Riyadh to Baghdad and Beirut, people will live in free and independent societies, where a desire for peace is reinforced by ties of diplomacy, tourism, and trade. Iran and Syria will be peaceful nations, where today's oppression is a distant memory and people are free to speak their minds and develop their talents. And al Qaeda, Hezbollah, and Hamas will be defeated, as Muslims across the region recognize the emptiness of the terrorists' vision and the injustice of their cause.

Overall, the Middle East will be characterized by a new period of integration and tolerance. This does not mean that Israel and its neighbors will be best friends. But when leaders across the region answer to their people, they will focus their energies on schools and jobs, not on rocket attacks and suicide bombings. With this change, Israel will open a hopeful new chapter in which its people can live a normal life, and the dream of Herzl and the founders of 1948 can be fully and finally realized.

This is a bold vision, and some will say it can never be achieved. But think about what we have witnessed in our own time. When Europe was destroying itself through total war and genocide, it was difficult to envision a continent that six decades later would be free and at peace. When Japanese pilots were flying suicide missions into American battleships, it seemed impossible that six decades later Japan would be a democracy, a lynchpin of security in Asia, and one of America's closest friends. And when waves of refugees arrived here in the desert with nothing, surrounded by hostile armies, it was almost unimaginable that Israel would grow into one of the freest and most successful nations on Earth.

Yet each one of these transformations took place. And a future of transformation is possible in the Middle East too, so long as a new generation of leaders has the courage to defeat the enemies of freedom, make the hard choices necessary for peace, and stand firm on the solid rock of universal values.

Sixty years ago, on the eve of Israel's independence, the last British soldiers departing Jerusalem stopped at a building in the Jewish quarter of the Old City. An officer knocked on the door and met a senior rabbi. The officer presented him with a short iron bar – the key to Zion Gate – and said it was the first time in 18 centuries that a key to the gates of Jerusalem had belonged to a Jew. His hands trembling, the rabbi offered a prayer of thanksgiving to God, "Who had granted us life and permitted us to reach this day." Then he turned to the officer, and uttered the words Jews had awaited for so long: "I accept this key in the name of my people."

Over the past six decades, the Jewish people have established a state that would make that humble rabbi proud. You have raised a modern society in the Promised Land, a light unto the nations that preserves the legacy of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. And you have built a mighty democracy that will endure forever and can always count on America to stand at its side. May God bless Israel.

Buy this Book!

2008-05-12T13:08:00.000-07:00

I really need to recommend this book to you. It has totally changed my way of thinking and it is helping me to see real positive growth in my life. The concepts in this book go back many years to an article that the author, Bob Hughes, wrote. I had read the article probably 80 times. I had one in my car, one in my classroom, and another next to my bed. Honestly, I would put this book in a top 5 list of books that have helped me change the way I think in a very positive manner.

So, what is it about? It's about loving others well. I believe this book is a powerful tool in helping you carry out the greatest commandments which, of course, involve loving well (Matthew 22:37-40).

This book poses what I believe is the single greatest question every person must answer in their life: Is God enough? I know on the face of it this may not seem that ground-breaking or important, but, trust me, this is a profound point. As the author points out, most Christians believe that God loves them, but they do not act like God's love and grace are actually enough for them. This is a HUGE concept. If we truly believe that God's love and grace are sufficient for us, on a daily basis (or moment by moment basis) our actions will show it. We will live out our belief that GOD IS ENOUGH. Living out the "God is Enough" belief is such a stark contrast to simply believing "God loves me."

Intrigued? This book actually helps you understand these ideas and will give you the tools that will help you to live in a very love-focused and freeing way!

I strongly recommend that you get a copy of the book.

Buy it directly from this link: http://www.lovefocused.com/

Happy Mother's Day!

2008-05-11T21:09:00.000-07:00

After all, what boy doesn't love his mother?

Voting for Judges: Who Knows?

2008-05-10T12:54:00.001-07:00

Are you planning to vote in the upcoming election on June 3, 2008? I hope so. I wanted to let you all know who I am voting for in the judicial elections. I know that it's weird voting for judges because most of us are not informed in the "lesser" races. Who are these people? I took the time to do a bit of research, made some phone calls and even spoke to a couple of the candidates themselves. Here's how I am voting:

Judge of the Superior Court

Office No. 25

JOHN NHO TRONG NGUYEN

I am voting for him because it is very rare that a sitting judge is challenged. Mr. John Nguyen recently changed his party registration to be a "decline-to-state-voter" which is what I am. His opponent (be careful as they share the same last name) is a registered Democrat. The guy I voted for, John Nguyen, has the endorsement of a major Orange County Republican, Tom Fuentes.

Judge of the Superior Court

Office No. 4

NICK THOMPSON

After reading his website, I was leaning toward Mr. Nick Thompson. I then spoke with him over the phone and that put me over the top to choose him. Mr. Thompson is a law and order guy. The guy has seen combat too. He holds a Bronze Star for service in Iraq. He's received Army commendations.

Judge of the Superior Court

Office No. 8

BARRY COLLINS

I spoke with a friend of Mr. Collins over the phone. The friend happened to be a former pastor. Mr. Collins is a follower in the way of Jesus Christ. He has actually co-authored a children's book on biblical justice that I'm told is being used in Africa. Also, he has done work in Rwanda. Mr. Collins attends Saddleback Church. For you party-line people, I believe the higher ups in the GOP have actually endorsed Mr. Collins opponent, but I don't care. I think Mr. Collins will be a no-nonsense judge.

Judge of the Superior Court

Office No. 12

MICHAEL FLORY

This one is a bit trickier because there are four people running. The two at the top (Kermit Marsh & Debra Carrillo) are well-connected people and appear to be pretty beholden to the Republicans. They are both endorsed by the head D.A., Tony Rackauckas. BOTH of them!? Frankly, I don't care because it's politics as usual. Apparently, the only female candidate, Debra Carrillo, is a good friend of Mr. Rackauckas' wife so he "had" to endorse her. I received an e-mail from Carrillo and she made some strong allegations against Flory, saying he has had "several troubling incidents of bad behavior in court" so you might want to proceed with caution. I personally spoke with Mr. Flory and he actually reminds me of myself, politically only. I also feel he has the most experience for the job. He is a long-time Deputy D.A., a prosecutor. I like that. I also think it's cool that he listed his cell phone on his website: 714-305-5648. He told me, "Have your friends give me a call." He also claims one of his "problems" is being too honest. "I'm not going to tell you what you want to hear; I'm going to tell you what I actually believe." In all fairness, I also spoke with K.C. Jones who even Mr. Flory says is a nice guy. I just don't think he's going to be as good at the job of superior court judge. If you don't vote for Flory, you should vote for Debra Carrillo. She was a police officer for several years, then a bailiff, and now a deputy district attorney.

These are my opinions only. You can take them or leave them. My absentee ballot is in the mail.